Prologue - Mea Culpa, Sea Culpa
1 - Let Go of the Truth…This Is Just a Game
2 - All Is Illusion and Vain Fantasy
3 - What Was She to You
4 - No Friendly Drop to Help Me After
5 - Deep in the Dark
6 - Whispers in the Dark
7 - A Thousand Words
8 - When All Other Lights Go Out
9 - Now You See It, Now You Don't
10 - Booyacashah (or the Interrogation Begins)
11 - Do You Want Me to Look?
12 - A Change in the Wind
13 - The Vow (aka Ice Cream Pretty Much Cures Everything)
14 - Talk of Spoon-Shanking in the Eye (aka Eat Your Heart Out, Cindy Crawford)
15 - I've Just Seen a Face
16 - The Flaws in Other Plans
17 - Falsehoods for a Purpose
18 - The Price of a Drop of Blood
19 - Whatever Happened to Agent Coulson?
20 - Discovering the Lies
21 - A Reference to Skyfall
Darkness There, and Nothing... CH. 22 (coming soon!)
23 - A Little Too Late
24 - Filling Boxes and Playing Baseball
25 - The First Steps Toward Mutiny
26 - A Prince Posing as a Postman
27 - Lost and Found
Epilogue - Absolutely
Deleted Scene - The Haughty Heart Grown Humble
Trailer #1
Trailer #2
Thursday, October 24, 2013
26 - A Prince Posing as a Postman
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Thor didn't mean to, but sometime in the wee hours of the morning, he fell asleep in the chair at the other end of Loki's bedchamber, to the sounds of splashing and laughter from the recording currently playing on the screen. When he woke again around midmorning, his foster brother was scribbling on a sheet of paper. Every so often he would pause to consult a thick tome bound in brown leather tooled with silver. Thor yawned. Scratched his beard. Loki didn't look like the deathly pale, tortured phantom the crown prince had first seen upon entering the bedchamber the night before. Still too pale for the Asgardian's liking, Loki seemed in better spirits this morning; focused rather than driven, tired rather than haggard with exhaustion. Thor had to wonder when his brother had managed to sleep…if he had slept.
"Morning," Thor yawned. His brother mumbled something without looking away from whatever he was writing. "Have you slept at all?"
"No time," Loki replied shortly. "This needs to be finished quickly. Too much time has been wasted already."
"What is that? A letter?"
Loki shook his head, quill pen scritch-scratching across the page. "I wrote my letters already. There." He gestured to two letters—one thick, perhaps three or four pages, and one consisting of only a single folded sheet of paper—both already sealed with green wax and resting on his bed. "I've begun working on the seiðr algorithms necessary to begin repairs to the shattered quantum üru pilings that frame the first of the seven spectrum matrices in the Bifröst. The fools…how can they not know that you must begin reweaving the spectrum matrices in their proper order? The Bifröst may look like all of a piece but it isn't, the bloody idiots. Little wonder the cursed thing refuses to hold together."
Thor pressed a hand to his head and grimaced. "You know, Brother, you are the only person I know who can make me feel as if I have a mead-head first thing in the morning just by opening your mouth."
A small smile tugged at Loki's lips. Thor noticed they were still raw from how his foster brother had savaged them with his teeth all these months. "You never could understand mathematics," Loki said with a fleeting look of indulgence on his thin face.
Thor snorted and got to his feet, stretching the kinks out of his spine. "Was that what you were talking about? All I heard was seiðr this and üru that and— what in the Nine Realms is that?"
He pointed to a cloth item on the bed beside the letters. It looked like a bright green, oblong bag with no opening…but it had just started pulsing. Like a spider's egg-sac readying to hatch forth a thousand little eight-legged, blood-sucking plague-beasts. And it was glowing.
Loki spared a glance for the cloth sack on the bed. "Oh. A gift for…for Sophie." A shadow passed over the pale face and thin, black brows drew sharply together. "I want to…to give her something. So she knows I think of her. So she knows that I…that I love her. I never want her to believe, to ever think for even a moment, that I do not love her with all my heart."
"She knows, Brother," Thor said softly. "Thea tells her every day." Then, slightly uneasy at the sight of the pulsing thing—Loki wasn't quite sane, he knew that—he added, "What is it?"
"In about forty-five seconds it will be a stuffed toy," Loki replied, going back to his scribbling on the Bifröst. "But by creating it this way, I've given it the ability to do something very interesting. Something that, from Thea's letters, I think Sophie will like quite a bit."
Even as Thor watched, the faint jade light emanating from the cloth bag intensified, deepening to a rich emerald. Golden sparks erupted across the woven surface, dancing and sparkling. There was a faint crackling sound, and a hum. The light dimmed. A dark seam split the sack from top to bottom and began to widen. When it was perhaps the width of Thor's hand and still as black and impenetrable as the darkness at the bottom of a well, the sack turned translucent, like malleable green glass, and slid back from the thing that had been growing inside of it. The darkness of the opened seam faded, revealing what Loki had made.
It was a butterfly. Made of soft cloth, with two buttons the color of spring blue-jays for eyes and a blue-stitched smile, it was a little smaller than Sophie's teddy bear. Pale yellow, dusty green, and rich blue cloth formed its body, but its wings…they rippled with a thousand of spring's pastel colors, shimmering in the light flooding the room from the window (when had Loki opened the window?) like real butterfly wings. It was obvious to anyone who looked that it was a toy…but it was also obvious, even to Thor, that it was an impressive piece of magic, as well.
"Thea said Sophie likes butterflies," Loki murmured. He'd paused a moment to look at the butterfly that had emerged from its cloth cocoon. "And ladybugs. I…I knew that, actually. It feels strange that I should know anything about her without being told by someone…I have never really met her, but…but I remembered, you see. From when Thea would bring her into the illusions. She loved butterflies with their bright colors, and ladybugs that weren’t afraid to land on her outstretched hands, and dragonflies with their jeweled bodies and their gossamer wings. So I made my daughter a butterfly. It gave me something to do after I'd finished the first few recordings and read Thea's letters while I waited for a servant to bring me the books and reports I needed." He glared at the stack of papers sandwiched between two other leather-bound books in his lap. "And little wonder the Bridge is not repaired yet. What has been done thus far is slipshod at best."
His expression softened as he looked at the box of letters, pictures, and silver discs. "I could have watched another recording…I wanted to, but…but I knew not when the servant would return, and I want no one else to see these yet. Do you think me foolish?" He added, glancing to Thor. "That I should horde such things? But…but these memories that she has captured for me…they're mine, you see. Untainted. Untouched by shadow, by madness. Pure and clean as fresh water in the mountains. These moments…they're mine, and mine alone for now…and I did not wish anyone else, save someone I trusted with my very soul, to see them. Do you think that foolish?"
Thor thought of what the Chitauri had done to his brother, warping and twisting his memories until Loki didn’t know who he could trust, who he could believe in, who loved him and who didn't…save Thea. He thought of the raw desperation and fear he'd sometimes glimpsed in Loki's eyes, but hadn't recognized or understood where it came from. He knew now. His brother had feared losing himself to the Chitauri darkness, and his memories were the threads that bound him, the blood and bone of who he was. Memory had helped to shape him into the man Thea loved so deeply. No wonder he guarded these new moments, these new memories, so jealously.
"No," Thor said softly. "No, I do not think you foolish, Loki." He nodded to the butterfly. "That is…an impressive piece of work."
"You know her better than I. Do you think…do you think she will like it?" The man who asked this didn't seem like the Loki that Thor had known for so many centuries. This man seemed uncertain, and tired, and nearly broken. If his daughter didn't like the toy, it would no doubt devastate him. The littlest thing might destroy the once proud prince. He was still so fragile.
The crown prince nodded. "I think she will." An awkward silence fell. Thor wanted to speak, to break that silence as Mjölnir might shatter stone…but he was uncertain what he should say. At last, he said, "Do you want me to deliver those today?" He indicated the letters.
Loki nodded. "If you would. The butterfly, as well." He closed his eyes. Deep lines etched across his face as he whispered, "Swear to me again that this is real. Swear it on the Norns. Swear it on Mother's life, on Mjölnir, on the love you bear your own lady. Swear it to me, Thor."
"I swear that this is all real, Loki. Your wife and child still live. You will be with them as soon as the Bifröst is mended. This I swear, by the Norns themselves and the Tapestry of Fate, on our mother's life. Thus I swear by my hammer as well as my love for Jane. What other token can I bring you, my brother, to erase your doubts?"
Green eyes stared at nothing as Loki drew a slow breath and let it ease out again. He glanced at the four pages of Thea's first letter. Swallowed. Closed his eyes once more. Voice a mere thread of sound, he replied, "Tell Thea when you see her…tell her that I am thinking of two things. Two poems she loved. 'To Amarantha,' and her own poem. She will know which one you mean, and she should give you something before you come back to Asgard."
"Will that prove to you that is all real?"
Loki sighed and glanced first at the shimmering stuffed butterfly toy on the bed, then to the window. Birdsong trilled cheerfully through the open window. A soft, late-spring wind tugged playfully at the emerald velvet curtains. Loki bit his lip—not hard, but the flesh was so ravaged, a few drops of blood welled up all the same.
"What will become of me, Thor, if I believe…and then this all melts away? All illusion and vain fantasy, melting through my fingers like the substance of broken dreams…The shards of those dreams are enough to carve out my very heart." Loki looked back at him at last and added, "I do not know if I can believe, Thor. Not until she is here. Not until I can hold her to me, feel her arms around my neck. Until I can breathe in her scent and hear her whisper to me that she is truly with me at last. But it will help, I think. Perhaps." Dropping his gaze back to the book and the papers in his lap, he said, "It matters not in the long run, I suppose. The Bifröst will be mended soon enough."
Thor's brows rose. "How soon, exactly?" How much progress could his brother have possibly made in the few hours he'd had after finishing Thea's letters?
"Four days," Loki said. Thor's jaw went slack and he stared at his brother. "If the king does not insist on questioning my every calculation and actually puts intelligent sorceresses to work on carrying out the designated repairs. Perhaps I can speak to Mother about it. Odin will need a team of seiðr adepts for each spectrum matrix. The hardest will be the first matrix…the weaving requires someone adept with fire seiðr." With another brief glance at Thor, he added, "I suggest Angbodr and Amora. Give that suggestion to the king without attaching my name to it. If he asks, remind him that both of them are two of the strongest fire adepts in Asgard."
He hesitated. "You are certain you can work with them?"
"I will not be working with them," Loki replied. "I will give my calculations to Mother. She can give them to the king. Odin can do as he likes with them."
That was the second time his brother had called Frigga "Mother," but he had yet to call Odin "Father." Thor frowned. Keeping his voice nonchalant, he asked something he'd wondered about for some time. "Loki…you once said Thea was disgusted by our father—"
"Your father," Loki said softly. "He does not claim me as his son."
Thor shook his head. "That is not true. Our father loves you. The Chitauri have twisted your perceptions, Brother. Remember? They have—"
"Been unable to play with my memories of the past nineteen months to that point," Loki replied coldly, without looking up from whatever he was writing. "You came to me often. Tyr, Víðarr, even the twins came to me at least once or twice. In my bitterness, in my grief, I could not bear to have them near. I wanted so much to tell them…" He trailed off. The silence was broken only by the scritch of the pen and the crackle of the flames on the bedroom hearth.
"To tell them what?"
The tip of Loki's quill pen flicked against his lips, pinched nearly white. He gazed sightlessly at the page for a few moments before finally speaking. "I wanted to tell them about Thea. About Sophie. About the days and weeks and months of fear and blood and pain. But I knew they would not believe."
Gently, Thor said, "Mother would have."
"Have we not broken her heart enough?" Loki asked with a bitter twist of his mouth. "The bold, brave sons of Queen Frigga, the wisest and most beautiful woman in Asgard…no. No, I would not have inflicted that pain on her. I would not have hurt her with my confessions. But Odin." Loki's voice had softened and gentled as he spoke of the queen. Now a savage fury smoldered beneath the words, a coldness like the arctic winds of Jötunheim. "Odin never came. He refused to see me after my trial. Refused to look at me with any warmth, any love at all. The only times he came to me were because of you. Because you wanted him there. No matter how much he claimed to love me in the past, those words were merely that—words."
"Did Thea believe that?" Thor asked, wondering if he dared too much by asking. "You said once that she despised our father. That he disgusted her. Was that true?" The question had niggled at the back of his mind, but there had never been a good time to ask until now. When Loki had made that claim, even back then, Thor had sensed something like deceit in his brother…but not quite. More like Loki was only telling half the truth.
Loki let out a pent-up breath. "No," he said at last. "She didn't. But she had…has a generous heart. She forgives often and easily, and is always willing to give someone the benefit of the doubt."
Thinking of her hostility toward Nicholas Fury, Thor snorted. "Not always."
One black brow winged upward. "Well…she can be quite the mother lioness with those she loves. But no, she did not believe Odin cared nothing for me…"
The hollow bonk-bonk of the basketball thudding against the gray cement of the basketball court was oddly reassuring to Loki as Thea let the ball hit pavement, bounce up to smack her palm, and then slam back to the court again. Since that moment when they had kissed for the first time only a week ago in the illusionary ballroom, it seemed he found comfort in nearly every routine thing she did.
Perhaps because his silent confession of love had changed nothing between them. She still adored him completely. He still worshipped her. The new intimacy that existed between them, so beautiful, so strong when such things were normally so fragile, hadn’t damaged what they'd already had as they had both feared it might.
Loki lay, eyes closed, stretched out at the far end of the court—which Thea had made as soft as spring grass for him—soaking up the warmth of the sun. From the other end of the basketball court there came the hollow metallic thunk of the ball hitting the backboard before swooshing into the net and thudding back to the ground. Then there was silence for a time, punctuated only by the twitter of birds and the rustle of the wind in the grass. He didn't open his eyes when he heard Thea's footsteps on the cement coming toward him at a rapid pace. He waited until she bounded up to him and dropped down to the ground at his side.
"Hey," she said. When he opened his eyes, she was smiling, but there was sorrow in it. He wondered if she knew how often he caught a glimpse of the sorrow and fear underneath her happiness. It wasn't false, that happiness. Being with him brought her real joy…but that didn't erase the fear. They were still prisoners.
"Hello," Loki murmured. His lips curved into a smile when her fingertips touched the arch of his cheekbone, tracing to the shallow dip beneath the rise of bone, then to the corner of his mouth and over his lips. "Resorting to manhandling me during my repose, now, are we?"
She giggled. "You know you like it. I'm the greatest G-rated man-handler you are ever going to meet. Go ahead and feel all kinds of lucky. You won the manhandling lottery. Do a fist-pump; I promise not to judge. We love goddesses are above such petty prejudices." Loki merely chuckled and she grinned. "I'm glad you're smiling. That's why I came over. And to bother you." She pushed on his shoulder. "Bother."
"The horror," Loki muttered, unable to suppress his smile. "The agony. I do not believe I can bear another moment of this torture."
Thea pushed on his shoulder again. "Bother," she said, laughing.
"Oh," Loki said dryly. "Please. Mercy. It hurts." Laughing still, she collapsed onto his stomach, settling herself perpendicular to his body so she could use his belly as a pillow. Loki raised an eyebrow. "Comfortable?"
"Mmm," she replied. But then he sensed a shifting in her mood, a sudden seriousness chasing away the moment of amusement. Softly, she said, "Why don't you talk about your dad?" He stiffened. Tried to force himself to relax. Thea continued, "You've told me all about your mom, your brothers. Your friends. Your witchy ex-girlfriends," she added with what might have been a snarl under the words. "But never about your dad."
"I do not have a father," Loki said flatly.
Thea snorted, somehow keeping the sound from coming across as derisive. If anything, she sounded exasperated. "Everyone has a dad, Loki. You have two, just like me. Well, I have three, if you count the guy who spawned me like a salmon. But whatever. You've got two. One's a super douche who should go drown himself in a bucket of acid. The other is an idiot who needs parenting lessons…but you never talk about either of them."
He shrugged as best he could while lying down. "There is little to speak of. Laufey's wife, Farbuti, carried and birthed me. Then the two of them, disappointed by my weak stature, left me to die in the Jötunn temple from the elements."
He felt her nod. "Yeah, I know. Then Odin found you and took you in."
The disguised Frost Giant made a sharp sound of negation. Thea didn’t seem to react to his suddenly foul temper, his surge of irritation; in Asgard, if he'd made that noise during a conversation with a woman, she would have fluttered and dithered, trying to ease his upset, trying to avoid some sort of fallout. Thea simply let him be upset…which, in itself, helped soothe his temper. It proved that she didn't fear Loki the Frost Giant, Loki the monster, Loki the killer, Loki the destroyer of Jötunheim. His anger didn’t frighten her; he'd never had that from a woman before.
"He took me from Jötunheim so he could use me as a bargaining chip," Loki muttered, flexing his fingers. "To buy peace between Asgard and Jötunheim."
Thea said nothing for a moment. She simply reached around with her left hand and touched his jaw, dancing her fingertips over his skin. That soothed him, too. Loki had always detested being touched by strangers, but he'd found something comforting in physical contact with those he loved. His mother, for instance. Thor. And Thea.
At last Thea said, "He may have saved your life for an ulterior motive, but it's impossible to be around a person for that long without learning to care for them." Loki made a sound of derision—Odin didn't care about him! He'd proved that when he'd condemned Loki while the fostered prince hung practically by his fingertips from the haft of Gungnir. After everything he'd done to protect Asgard, wrong and dangerous and ruthless as it had been, his father had denied him yet again. But Thea added, "Look at you and me."
Loki frowned. "I fail to see the connection."
"Admit it. You would never have fallen for a freak like me, not in a million bazillion years, if not for the fact that we fell in love because we're trapped in our little conjoined hell-boxes. You wouldn’t have looked twice at me. And even when we became friends—and of course we became friends; I stuffed you full of pizza and pudding—did you ever see us falling like this?"
He shifted his right arm, bringing it from behind his head to atop his torso so he could thread his fingers through the warm silk of her hair. Would he have believed he'd lose his heart and soul to this woman? A Midgardian? A commoner? A so-called "freak?" No. Not then. But he had learned to love her, first as a friend—there had been no else, and he had needed someone desperately—and then as a woman, as his lady.
"Odin may have taken a bargaining chip from Jötunheim," she said softly. "But if you think about it, he lost that bargaining chip when he lost his heart to a sweet, innocent baby rescued from the ice."
There was something thick and salty lodged in his throat; it made it difficult to breathe, to swallow. He shifted, and Thea immediately sat up, knowing he needed some distance between them. Loki surged to his feet and staggered several paces away, shaking a little.
Lost his heart. Lost his heart? Odin? To the wretch he'd brought back from the northern wastes? To the foundling who could never belong? The one who was always second-best, always chosen last, always ignored, always unwanted? Yes, Tyr had been the heir, and then Thor after him, but…but he'd always tried so hard to be what Odin wanted and it had never been even close to enough.
"Parents always want their children to be the best," Thea added, coming close to him. She didn’t touch him. That was the thing about her—she would have long ago driven Loki completely mad if not for the fact that she always gave him what he needed. Perhaps her empathic abilities guided her. Whatever it was, she never offered silliness when he needed her consideration, never smothered him when he needed distance. "And they always worry when their children don't fit in."
Loki scoffed. "And how would you know that, Althea? You have no children secreted away back on Midgard, I trust?"
Her laugh was soft and inviting, a gentle coaxing to let go of his foul mood. "Yeah, no. No babies for me just now. You know, being a virgin and all. But I know. Trust me. I'm a mutant, for crying out loud. And so are three of my siblings. My mom's biggest fear when we were kids was someone finding out while we were out somewhere and a mob killing us because we were different from everyone else. So trust me, I know."
"You think that is why Odin always compared me to Thor, to Tyr? Even to Víðarr? Because he feared for me because I was a different?" Loki shook his head. "I was a prince. My so-called father was a king. What had I to fear?"
Thea came close enough to slide her arms around him. She laid her cheek against the spot between his shoulder blades. He felt her, warm and pliant, at his back. "What did you have to fear?" She echoed. "Every sucky thing that happened in your life. People being cruel to you, to your face and behind your back, because you were different. Which was what your dad tried to prevent by making you the same." She sighed. "Took my mom until Cleo was in elementary school—Cleo's the youngest—before she realized that it's easier to handle being different when you've got your family behind you. Looks like your dad hasn’t figured that out yet."
A rueful smile tugged at Loki's mouth. "That simple, is it?"
"Parenting is never simple. My mom always says anyone who tells you dealing with your kids is easy is just stringing you. It's all secrets and lies to sucker the rest of us into breeding."
The smile emerged in full force at her wary tone. "Indeed. So my brother says…or words to that effect. But tell me, since you seem fairly wise about such things. Why did my father not tell me I was a foundling?"
Thea sighed. "Because he's stupid."
Loki glanced over his shoulder at her. "That's all you have to say? No words of wisdom?"
"Actually, if you figure this one out, you've pretty much got the universe figured out, too. He loves you. Love makes people stupid. It also makes the world go round." Thea frowned. "Which pretty much means that stupid makes the world go round. That is a scary thought. But yeah, I think that's pretty insightful. Goddess of beauty and wisdom over here. Where's my tiara? But in seriousness, Loki…do you know why my mom made sure I knew I was adopted from the time she got hold of me and my brother?"
He shook his head.
"Because she was adopted, but no one told her for a long time. Somehow a kid found out about it at her school and told her some horrible things about how being adopted meant your real parents threw you away. She never wanted me or the rest of my siblings to go through anything like that.
"But you know what? We did anyway. Obnoxious kids said the same thing to Austin and Theo and me about our birth parents. In mine and Theo's case, it was true. Our mom left us on the steps of a cathedral in the middle of winter. We could've died.
"Odin probably didn't want you going through the same thing. You know how kids can be if they feel like it. Your mom even said it—they never wanted you to feel different."
"I am different!" Loki snapped, turning to glare at her. "I have always been different! And I have always been shunned for that difference! The Asgardians always considered me a…a freak! Unnatural! It didn't help, my parents' lies! It helped nothing!"
Thea shook her head. "No. It didn't. Because parents love us, and it makes them stupid sometimes. They think they're doing what's best, but they're really not. Can you blame them for trying?" When he said nothing, she sighed.
"I had a friend once. A girl at school. Allison. She didn’t board at the school, she lived at home nearby. One time we were all talking about running away, whether we'd really do it or not. A lot of the kids at school had bad home situations—or would, if their parents ever found out they were mutants. And Allison dumped out the bag she always carried, which had a lot of stuff in it. Another kid asked if she always carried that much stuff in her bag, and she said she did. We talked about that. But remember, I'm an empath. I knew there was more going on. So I asked her why. And she just looked at me for a moment, then grabbed all of her stuff, got up, and walked away."
Loki frowned. "I…do not understand."
She nodded. "I know. Wait a sec. So I followed her. And I realized when I caught up to her that the reason she carried all that stuff was because either she really wanted to run away, or she wanted people to think she really wanted to. And I asked her what it was like at her house, and she started to cry. I asked her if her parents hurt her, if that was the problem, or were doing things to her. Things we needed to tell our teachers about. But she shook her head and said, 'Worse.' When I asked her what it was, she said, 'They ignore me.' Which sounds kind of stupid, but I could feel what she was feeling. I knew it wasn't stupid, and it wasn't unimportant. It was major big, the kind of thing she was talking about. She meant they literally didn't care. If she'd been hit by a bus or robbed a bank or decided to tap-dance naked covered in chocolate sauce at the local Baptist church, they wouldn’t have given a flying rat's buttered carcass.
"My mom has never ignored me. She's never hurt me. She's never done anything bad to me, or my brothers or sisters. When the Super Douche hurt Austin, she got us out of there after letting us kick his butt a little bit. She's my mom. And she loves me. And I think, if I wasn't a mutant, the Super Douche would love me now just as much as he loved me when I was little. But honestly, I would rather my parents hurt me a little by accident trying to show they love me than for them to ignore my existence, like I don't matter to them at all.
"I matter to my mom. You matter to your dad. Parents just do really dumb stuff sometimes. Make mistakes. So do we. I mean, look at us. I love you more than a chocaholic squirrel loves an almond Hershey bar. I'd do anything for you." Loki's eyes widened and his heart knifed sideways in his chest, but Thea didn't let him interrupt. She continued, "And considering the situation in which we find ourselves—prisoners in the dank creepy dungeon of the alien-spawn of the mutant-demon cockroaches with poky sticks of shocky torment—that's pretty stupid of me. Logically, I should be looking out for just myself. You shouldn't even be bothering with a whacko like me.
"And yes, I'm a whacko. I had the opportunity to be Miss Universe because I was such a stellar babe and decided not to because I had to wear this ugly bathing suit and get my picture taken. Pretty crazy, right? I could've been a beauty queen. Boys would have drooled over me while ogling me on the television. I could've ripped their metaphorical hearts out with just my gaze. Think of the power at my fingertips.
"And yet, despite logic trying to worm its way into our brains, here we are. In love. Madly. Stupidly. Dangerously. Like I said—people do dumb stuff when they love someone. Even parents. Even kings. Even your dad."
Loki just stared at her for a minute, lost for words. Thea rocked back on her heels, sliding her hands into the back-pockets of her jeans, and waited for him to figure out what he wanted to say. Eventually he managed to murmur, "Am I to take it, then, that you think me stupid for caring for you?"
She stared back at him for several long moments of silence, then laughed. It almost sounded as if she were in pain. "Ohmigawsh, really? Are we changing the subject from your dad to you and our relationship now? Okay, fine. Do I think you're dumb? No. Oblivious? Well, to be honest…considering I was pouring out my heart to you last week and you didn't even realize it, yeah. Little oblivious. You don’t see how fantastically, splendiferously cool you are. I blame the Witches of the East, West, and…well, Amora's blond. We'll make her the Witch of the South. And what's her face. Sif. I blame the four of them. Death to the bimbos, blah-blah." Cuddling close to him, she slid her arms around his neck. "Here's the basic deal, Green Eyes. Either your dad loves you, in which case, yay! Or he doesn't. In which case, boo! Doom on him! But either way, you know what doesn't change?"
Looking into her eyes, silver and blue swirling together, a smile curving her lips, he asked softly, "What? Tell me." Though somehow he knew already. He knew what she would say, and it pushed back the anger and hurt still twisting and knotting inside him until it barely registered.
"No matter what anyone else thinks, I still think you're the greatest thing since the invention of butterscotch pudding. I'd eat your splendid and smexy self with a spoon, just like pudding…okay, that sounds just a little dirty. But, hey. I love you." She bounced up on tiptoe and pressed her mouth to his in a fleeting kiss that left his lips tingling pleasantly. "Forget everyone else. Who cares if you're a freak? You're a hot freak. Who cares if you're a Frost Giant? I dig guys with blue skin. Who cares if you're different? So am I. Really different." She shrugged. "So what? I love you."
Loki reached up to cup her face. Allowed his thumb to brush her cheek in a gentle sweep that sent her eyelashes fluttering. Thea drew a shallow breath. He lowered his forehead to hers. Rested it there, and just stood with her for a moment. Loki could feel how she melted into his arms when he touched her. Feel every beat of her heart, every shallow breath she took through slightly parted lips. Why did Thea trust him so much? No woman had ever trusted him with herself like this.
"That means more to me than you can ever know," Loki whispered just before his lips brushed against the soft silk of hers. Just the barest touch. A hint of taste. She tasted of chocolate and vanilla cream, with an undertaste of sugar and syrup. Cream puffs and that drink she liked so much…Pepsi. Thea offered him a soft sigh as his lips caressed hers again. Once. Twice. She pressed closer to him.
Thea accepted him. She cared for him. Loved him. It was so new, so strange, to think that someone he wanted, someone he loved like this, could want and love him in return…but she did. And that made her all the more precious.
Perhaps Thea was right. Perhaps love did make people stupid.
But Loki didn't care.
Thor strode down the palace corridor an hour later, Loki's words echoing in his skull long after he'd left his foster brother. Love makes people stupid. Yes, he thought. It probably did. But it was glorious, too. Both the crown prince and his foster brother knew that.
He'd already delivered Loki's instructions on the Bifröst to his mother and contacted Víðarr to arrange for travel back to Midgard. He carried Loki's two precious letters, as well as the butterfly. He would meet Víðarr at the edge of the Bifröst. Already Thor was thinking of what Sophie would do when she saw the toy her father had made for her. Would she like it? He thought she would, but…but what if she didn't? And how would Thea react to knowing that Loki predicted they would be reunited in a mere four days?
"Thor!" At the sound of his father calling his name, the prince turned. Odin emerged from the dining hall with something in his hand. He approached his son and held it out. It was a letter. Princess Althea had been written in Odin's strong hand. "I meant to give this to you at breakfast but—"
"Forgive me, Father. I breakfasted with Mother. I did not know you wished to speak to me." Thor took the letter, adding it to the two he already held. Noting his father's gaze on the prince's burden, he added, "Letters from Loki. One is for Thea, one for Sophie."
"And the butterfly?" Odin asked with an odd expression on his face.
"A gift from Loki for his daughter," Thor murmured. "Sophie is quite fond of butterflies."
Odin nodded, but he still seemed distracted, still bore that strange look. Frowning, the king said, "You were with Loki all through the night?" Baffled, Thor nodded. Odin pursed his lips. "Did he say anything to you about your mother or I?"
Thor hesitated. He didn't want to betray Loki's confidence or hurt his father, but…but Odin needed to know how his foster son felt about him. Yet if Thor's words encouraged his father to put even one foot wrong, it could cause irreparable damage to the already frayed bond between Odin and Loki. At last, Thor finally settled one, "He spoke of you both. I would wait until Thea comes to Asgard, Father, before you attempt to speak to Loki."
After a moment, Odin nodded. "Your mother says that Loki predicts the Bifröst could be repaired in a matter of days, if his calculations are correct."
He nodded. "I intend to tell Thea the same. I think it will help her. She is…grieved by Loki's absence. This news should lift her spirits."
"You're fond of her."
Thor frowned. "She is my sister. And she loves my brother."
Odin nodded thoughtfully, single blue eye distant. "I wonder if she doubts me as Loki does," the king murmured almost absently. "I hope that if it is so, I can change her opinion. She is the mother of my grandchild, after all. As for Loki…I wonder if it is even possible to change his mind about such things anymore." Then he seemed to shake himself out of his reverie. Smiling at Thor, he clapped his son on the shoulder. "Go, then, my son. Give your sister this glad news."
With a somewhat worried smile for his father, Thor headed for the Bifröst. But he had to wonder what his father was thinking. Would he try to sway his foster son's opinion about him? Try to heal the breach between them? Or would he step back, trying only to forge a bond with Sophie and Thea, unwilling to try for Loki again? That wouldn’t work; Thor knew that. The love between Loki and Thea would get in Odin's way. The All-Father had to know that he had to keep trying with the pseudo-Æsir if he was ever to have any sort of relationship with his granddaughter.
"I can tell from your face that you are thinking too much," Víðarr said as Thor approached. The prince dragged himself from his thoughts and focused on his brother. Today, not only was Víðarr waiting at the edge of the broken Rainbow Bridge, but so was Bellalyse.
Bellalyse, daughter of Ynġvï of the Vanir, was probably one of the most beautiful women Thor had ever seen in the whole of his eleven-odd centuries. Perhaps not quite as lovely as Freya, whom mortals had once worshipped as a goddess of love and beauty, but still beautiful. Her hair—which many of the women of court claimed was unfairly enchanted—hung nearly to her knees in a waterfall of burnished copper, with hints of auburn and antique gold. Though she wore it unbound, it never seemed to tangle. She had the pink-cheeked paleness of a mortal milkmaid, and hands that had seen their fair share of work, but Víðarr claimed her past as the daughter of a shepherd and farmer made it easier for him to teach her the basics of sword-work, since she already had more calluses and muscle than the daintier court beauties. She was a somewhat shy creature, but once she'd grown used to Thor and Víðarr's other brothers, she'd laughed and joked with them as if she'd known them all her life.
Thor knew she could do typical women's work—sewing, cooking, weaving, and the like—but that her passion was working with animals. And little wonder, for though Bellalyse had a great deal of innate seiðr, it came out in a rather unique way: she could understand the speech of beasts. At the moment, she was laughing cheerfully with a scarlet-breasted robin, which pecked industriously at the small bit of grain in her cupped hand. Víðarr went back to watching his young bride with a besotted expression on his face.
"And what says your robin today, my sister?" Thor asked Bellalyse as he drew near. The robin shot him a quick, nervous look with one bright, black eye before going back to the proffered grain, chirping occasionally.
Tossing back her hair, Bellalyse smiled at Thor. "He says it is easier to fly near the Bridge now. Something new has happened in the last hour; the air isn't so thick with frustration anymore. And he asks if I might bring him some barley tomorrow, because he's a little greedy-guts."
"But you will do it anyway, won't you, my älskling?" Víðarr asked, brushing his palm over the waterfall of her hair. She nodded.
"It's nesting season yet. The poor thing's been flown ragged by his lady-love, finding food for their babies; there's a cat nearby and she dares not leave the nest alone. I'm the only way he gets anything at all to eat." She cooed at the robin, who lifted his head and chirped back at her. Bellalyse made a little chirruping sound. The robin did a sort of hop-flutter and gobbled up the very last bit of grain. He cheeped at her, then flew away. She smiled. "He'll be back tomorrow." She focused her attention on the two men. Smoothing her hands over the skirt of her pale blue gown, she ventured, "Thor…are you going to see Loki's wife on Midgard?"
Thor couldn’t decide if he wanted to smile or curse. "Word travels quickly. I am."
Bellalyse laced her hands together. "When will you bring her to Asgard? You will bring her to Asgard, will you not?"
He nodded. "Of course. The moment the Bifröst is finished." He grinned at her. "You'll soon not be suffering for company aside from we few heathen men-folk, my dear sister. Does that please you?"
Her smile flashed, clear and bright as sunlight on water. "Yes. Not that I do not adore you scoundrels," she added, leaning against her husband and sliding both of her arms around one of his. "But it will be nice for the queen and me to have another girl in the family. Well, good luck to you both." She pressed a swift kiss to Víðarr's mouth and a ridiculous smile spread across the Asgardian prince's face. With another smile at Thor, Bellalyse added, "Take care, both of you."
"I will look after your husband, Sister," Thor said, clapping Víðarr on the shoulder. "You needn't fear for him. Come on, Brother. Stop staring after your pretty wife. She will be here when we get back. Come now, you need to concentrate, or we may end up arriving on Midgard with goat legs or webbed feet."
Víðarr shot him a quelling look. "I may not be a sorcerer, Thor, but I trust you have more faith in my seiðr skills than that."
This time, Víðarr brought them directly to the small copse of trees in Thea's neighborhood where the local children seemed to congregate. Careful to appear within the shadow of the oak and ash trees themselves instead of near the playground equipment, Thor had to take a moment to steady himself. Before his stomach could incite treason against him, Víðarr gave him another vial of mint tisane to swallow, which soothed his churning belly enough that he no longer feared being sick. Afterward, they made their way to Thea's house.
Unlike their previous visit, Coulson didn't answer the door. Instead, Thor found himself looking down at Cleo, Thea's youngest sister. She wore the blue denim trousers with straps that Thor vaguely recalled were known as overalls over a white shirt with quite a few multicolored handprints smeared across it. She tossed her wheat-blond hair over her shoulder and smiled.
"Hey, it's you guys. Is that hot captain with you? Oh. No, he's not. Oh, boo. Well, whatever, come on in." Opening the door wide to allow them entrance, she moved off down the hall, calling over her shoulder, "You guys here to talk to Thea?"
"Yes," Thor replied as he and Víðarr followed after the Midgardian maiden. "And to see Sophie, as well."
Cleo swiveled around, walking backward as she said, "Sophie's having her morning nap right now. You don't want her to miss that. She gets a little…yeah." Cleo grimaced. "You don't even wanna risk…yeah. No. Hang on. Thea! Hey, Thea! Theatre! Scientific theory! Theocracy!"
Thea poked her head around a corner, scowling, but her silvery blue eyes twinkled. "Hey, Cleopatra! It's pronounced 'thee-uh-tuh,' not 'thee-ate-err.'"
"I am not Cleopatra," Cleo replied with stiff dignity. She jerked a thumb over her shoulder at Thor and Víðarr. "Your in-laws are here."
Thea's eyes lit up. "Thor! Víðarr! You're back!" She came out of what Thor realized was the kitchen, holding a dishcloth in one hand and a small, translucent, yellow—was it a cup?—in the other. Without a moment's hesitation, she went to Thor and hugged him. "What are you two doing here?" Then the light in her eyes dimmed and her cheeks paled as she asked, "What is it? What's happened? Is it Loki? Is he all right?"
Thor opened his mouth, but before he could answer, Cleo half-growled, half-sighed. "Ugh, for crying out loud, relax! They're not the Mafia. They're not going to hurt him. Calm down before you wake up the midgets. Ashley's napping, too, you know. Look, Thebes—see? Thor's got stuff for you. Look."
Víðarr raised an eyebrow at the two sisters. "Thebes?" He echoed.
A small smile flitted across Thea's face. "If it's got a thuh-sound at the beginning with a long E after it, Cleo puts it on the nickname list. So Loki's all right?"
"Loki is fine," Thor reassured her. "Better than he has been in some time, in fact. My father let him out of prison. He spent last night in his own chambers writing you these." He held out the two letters.
Her mouth fell open. Her hands shook as she reached for them. The very tips of her fingers ever so lightly brushed the edge of the thick, many-paged missive Loki had written to her before her hands jerked back in an almost frightened spasm. Her mouth closed. She swallowed. Her lips parted again, as if she would speak, but then she just pressed her lips together and kept silent. After several heartbeats, she took the letters from him. Blue eyes slowly traced the name Thea written in Loki's strong handwriting upon the topmost of the letters. Her bottom lip trembled.
Thor cleared his throat. The sound made Thea jump. Her eyes darted from her name addressed on the letter to Thor's face. Thor murmured, "Loki is afraid to believe you're alive. He read your letters and watched several of the recordings, but he is still afraid. I asked him what would help erase his doubts, and he said to give you a message."
She nodded. "Okay. What message?"
"He said to tell you that he is thinking of two things." Thor frowned fiercely, trying to remember his foster brother's exact words. "Two poems you loved. 'To Amarantha,' and…he said the second one was…your own poem? He said you would know which one he meant, and that you would give me something before I returned to Asgard."
Thea frowned as confusion spread across her face. "Give you something? What…" Then her face cleared. Her eyes lit up and she smiled. "'To Amarantha.' Oh, duh. I feel dumb now." Thor's brows rose in silent question. "It's in the poem. 'To Amarantha' is a love poem Lovelace wrote to his sweetheart about how much he loved her hair. He wants a lock of my hair."
Cleo made a noise. "What? Why? Ew. That's kinda weird."
Her sister rolled her eyes at the maiden. "If you paid attention in history class, you would know that a lock of a girl's hair, tied with a ribbon, is considered a token of love in a lot of cultures—including among the Norse. And my poem…it's another Lovelace piece. Loki thought it fit our situation. 'To Althea from Prison.' Pretty fitting, huh? I used to read to him when…when the Chitauri had us. He told you that, didn't he?" She asked. Thor nodded. "I read him all my favorites, including that one." She nodded slowly, lips pursed in thought. "I know how to get rid of his doubts. Or most of them. I don't think anything will get rid of them all except seeing me." Her eyes flashed to Thor's face. "How long before I can see him? Do you know? Did you convince him to help with the Bifröst repairs?"
Thor nodded, smiling, because here at last was good news he could give her. "I convinced him. He has already started, and he says if all goes according to his calculations, the Rainbow Bridge will be repaired in four days."
Thea's eyes widened. "Four…four days? Four days?" She let out a cry of utter joy and threw her arms around Thor's neck. He returned the embrace as she cried, "Four days, just four days, I can see him in just four days!" She drew back, wiping at her eyes. "Four days?" He nodded again. She laughed. "Just four days. Oh, that's fantastic. I thought it would be weeks, months even. But four days…I'm so happy. Ohmigawsh…I'm gonna cry. I can't believe it!"
In truth, neither could Thor. Not really. It seemed too good to be true, that in a mere four days, the Bifröst would be repaired. And once Loki was reunited with his wife and child, the crown prince could return to Jane. He could bring her to Asgard. Introduce her to his parents, his brothers. To Thea and Bellalyse. And then…well, he would have to wait and see, but he planned to…at least, he hoped to…
"Oh, I'm so sorry," Thea said abruptly, jolting Thor from his thoughts. "I don't mean to be rude. Come have a seat. Um…Sophie and Ashley are going to wake up from their naps soon, and it's my turn to do the snacks since Joie and my mom are out running errands, so I have to stay in the kitchen. But you guys can sit down in the dining room if you want."
Cleo shot her hand up in the air. "Um, I got a question. What's with the stuffed animal?"
"What stuffed animal?" Thea asked, then noticed the butterfly Thor carried tucked under his arm. "Oh. I was so focused on the letters…and I haven’t had much sleep lately. Um…yeah, what's with the stuffed animal?"
The crown prince held it out to his sister-in-law. "It is a gift for Sophie. Loki made it last night."
"Oh, wow," Thea whispered, taking the toy. Her touch jostled the butterfly's wings, making the myriad of pastel colors shift and shimmer like light singing across abalone shell, only brighter. Thea stared at the wings. "He always makes the most wonderful things with his seiðr. This is wonderful. She'll love it. She loves butterflies and colorful things. She'll love this. Uh…come into the kitchen, have a seat. Are you guys hungry? Thirsty?"
Thor and Víðarr turned down the offer, taking seats at the wooden dining room table as Thea placed the letters and butterfly on the kitchen counter next to a stack of what looked like more letters from other people. Cleo left them, saying she had something called "homework" to do.
Thea moved to the tall, white ice-chest known as a "refrigerator." Opening it, she pulled out a small glass bottle full of brown liquid. When she unscrewed the cap, and a fruity scent filled the dining area, Thor realized it was apple juice. Thea carefully poured it into the yellow cup-looking object she'd been holding earlier, filling it two-thirds of the way. Next she added water, filling the cup the rest of the way, before screwing on the dove-gray lid. She then put the same mixture into a small green cup that didn’t seem to need a lid.
"What is that?" Víðarr asked, gesturing to the yellow cup.
"A sippy-cup," Thea replied as she went to a wooden box on the counter and withdrew a loaf of bread. "So Sophie doesn't spill when she's drinking. It's sort of the transition for little kids between a bottle and a regular cup. I cut her juice with some water so she's not sucking down so much sugar. She gets crazy if she has too much sugar."
"Loki was like that," Thor recalled suddenly. Noticing Thea's expression, he smiled and added, "Once when we were boys—barely knee-high to Father—we helped Tyr sneak one of Mother's special cakes out of the kitchen. We split it between the three of us, but even so…Loki could not sit still after that. Father didn’t know what to do with him. Or with me, for that matter." He laughed, remembering. "We ran through the halls like wild animals for awhile before Father made us each sit completely still in chairs facing each other. Then Loki started making faces at me."
Thea laughed as she took slices of bread and laid them on two plates—one green, one yellow—on the counter. Next she went into the fridge and pulled out two jars—one filled with what appeared to be apricot preserves, and one filled with brown…was that cake frosting? Thea asked, "Then what happened?"
"I made faces back," Thor replied. "And we kept making faces. It riled us both up so match we could not have held still if we'd tried. It was like having toads in our shirts. We have done that before," he added, seeing Thea's baffled expression. "I do not remember why we did that…but I remember we did, because a few of the toads somehow ended up in Mother's sewing room. Anyway, so we squirmed and laughed—quietly, so Father wouldn't notice, though of course he did. Finally he told us to go outside and run around the stables until our legs got tired because we were making him tired just watching us." Seeing Thea spreading what appeared to be chocolate frosting on a slice of bread, Thor asked, "What is that?"
"Nutella," Thea said. "Chocolate-hazelnut spread. It's made with Splenda, though, so it's low in sugar to prevent the kids from going nuts. Sophie's allowed to have it on Fridays if she behaves all week. Every day is a special sandwich day, according to Ashley, and Sophie agrees. Sunday is plum preserve day for some reason. Monday is tomato day, Tuesday is peanut butter and banana day, Wednesday is strawberry jam day, Thursday is peanut butter and honey day, today is Nutella and apricot jam day, and tomorrow is apple butter day.
"We let them get away with it since they don't throw tantrums or anything. We just started noticing a pattern when we would ask them what they wanted for snack, and finally my mom mentioned that they always asked for the same thing on the same day, so Ashley explained her 'schedule.' And Sophie just stood next to her going, 'Ya. Ya. Ya.' They were really polite and cute about it, so we just gave them their way. It was the weirdest thing, but it didn't hurt anyone, so why not?" Having finished the two sandwiches, she licked the dull knife clean of Nutella, then added the apricot jam to the sandwiches with a spoon. "I personally prefer apple butter. It's so good."
Thor watched his brother's wife quickly and efficiently cut each sandwich into four little squares, four to a plate, before adding two tiny bunches of green grapes and a half-dozen little carrots to the snacks as well. Lastly, she added half a stick of white cheese to each plate. Thor had let her do all of this on her own because he was fairly graceless in a kitchen and did not wish to get in her way. But he did carry the plates to the table for Thea while she carried the green cup and the sippy-cup.
"It's ten-thirty," she said, glancing at the clock. "I need to go wake the girls up…" Thea trailed off as a puzzled expression crossed her face. Her head jerked around and she focused on the staircase that led to the second floor. A wooden gate stretched across the bottom of the staircase. During their last visit, Thea had explained that the safety gates at the top and bottom of the stairs kept Sophie from climbing them and possibly getting hurt. Now Thea took a step toward the stairs. Her brows furrowed. She closed her eyes, touching one hand to her temple.
Her eyes snapped open.
"No—" She started to say, when from the second floor of the house came the sound of two little girls screaming. Without a word, Thea dashed around the kitchen counter, hopped over the safety gate, and raced up the stairs. Thor and Víðarr followed close behind.
Chapter Twenty-Six
A Prince Posing as a Postman
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Thor didn't mean to, but sometime in the wee hours of the morning, he fell asleep in the chair at the other end of Loki's bedchamber, to the sounds of splashing and laughter from the recording currently playing on the screen. When he woke again around midmorning, his foster brother was scribbling on a sheet of paper. Every so often he would pause to consult a thick tome bound in brown leather tooled with silver. Thor yawned. Scratched his beard. Loki didn't look like the deathly pale, tortured phantom the crown prince had first seen upon entering the bedchamber the night before. Still too pale for the Asgardian's liking, Loki seemed in better spirits this morning; focused rather than driven, tired rather than haggard with exhaustion. Thor had to wonder when his brother had managed to sleep…if he had slept.
"Morning," Thor yawned. His brother mumbled something without looking away from whatever he was writing. "Have you slept at all?"
"No time," Loki replied shortly. "This needs to be finished quickly. Too much time has been wasted already."
"What is that? A letter?"
Loki shook his head, quill pen scritch-scratching across the page. "I wrote my letters already. There." He gestured to two letters—one thick, perhaps three or four pages, and one consisting of only a single folded sheet of paper—both already sealed with green wax and resting on his bed. "I've begun working on the seiðr algorithms necessary to begin repairs to the shattered quantum üru pilings that frame the first of the seven spectrum matrices in the Bifröst. The fools…how can they not know that you must begin reweaving the spectrum matrices in their proper order? The Bifröst may look like all of a piece but it isn't, the bloody idiots. Little wonder the cursed thing refuses to hold together."
Thor pressed a hand to his head and grimaced. "You know, Brother, you are the only person I know who can make me feel as if I have a mead-head first thing in the morning just by opening your mouth."
A small smile tugged at Loki's lips. Thor noticed they were still raw from how his foster brother had savaged them with his teeth all these months. "You never could understand mathematics," Loki said with a fleeting look of indulgence on his thin face.
Thor snorted and got to his feet, stretching the kinks out of his spine. "Was that what you were talking about? All I heard was seiðr this and üru that and— what in the Nine Realms is that?"
He pointed to a cloth item on the bed beside the letters. It looked like a bright green, oblong bag with no opening…but it had just started pulsing. Like a spider's egg-sac readying to hatch forth a thousand little eight-legged, blood-sucking plague-beasts. And it was glowing.
Loki spared a glance for the cloth sack on the bed. "Oh. A gift for…for Sophie." A shadow passed over the pale face and thin, black brows drew sharply together. "I want to…to give her something. So she knows I think of her. So she knows that I…that I love her. I never want her to believe, to ever think for even a moment, that I do not love her with all my heart."
"She knows, Brother," Thor said softly. "Thea tells her every day." Then, slightly uneasy at the sight of the pulsing thing—Loki wasn't quite sane, he knew that—he added, "What is it?"
"In about forty-five seconds it will be a stuffed toy," Loki replied, going back to his scribbling on the Bifröst. "But by creating it this way, I've given it the ability to do something very interesting. Something that, from Thea's letters, I think Sophie will like quite a bit."
Even as Thor watched, the faint jade light emanating from the cloth bag intensified, deepening to a rich emerald. Golden sparks erupted across the woven surface, dancing and sparkling. There was a faint crackling sound, and a hum. The light dimmed. A dark seam split the sack from top to bottom and began to widen. When it was perhaps the width of Thor's hand and still as black and impenetrable as the darkness at the bottom of a well, the sack turned translucent, like malleable green glass, and slid back from the thing that had been growing inside of it. The darkness of the opened seam faded, revealing what Loki had made.
It was a butterfly. Made of soft cloth, with two buttons the color of spring blue-jays for eyes and a blue-stitched smile, it was a little smaller than Sophie's teddy bear. Pale yellow, dusty green, and rich blue cloth formed its body, but its wings…they rippled with a thousand of spring's pastel colors, shimmering in the light flooding the room from the window (when had Loki opened the window?) like real butterfly wings. It was obvious to anyone who looked that it was a toy…but it was also obvious, even to Thor, that it was an impressive piece of magic, as well.
"Thea said Sophie likes butterflies," Loki murmured. He'd paused a moment to look at the butterfly that had emerged from its cloth cocoon. "And ladybugs. I…I knew that, actually. It feels strange that I should know anything about her without being told by someone…I have never really met her, but…but I remembered, you see. From when Thea would bring her into the illusions. She loved butterflies with their bright colors, and ladybugs that weren’t afraid to land on her outstretched hands, and dragonflies with their jeweled bodies and their gossamer wings. So I made my daughter a butterfly. It gave me something to do after I'd finished the first few recordings and read Thea's letters while I waited for a servant to bring me the books and reports I needed." He glared at the stack of papers sandwiched between two other leather-bound books in his lap. "And little wonder the Bridge is not repaired yet. What has been done thus far is slipshod at best."
His expression softened as he looked at the box of letters, pictures, and silver discs. "I could have watched another recording…I wanted to, but…but I knew not when the servant would return, and I want no one else to see these yet. Do you think me foolish?" He added, glancing to Thor. "That I should horde such things? But…but these memories that she has captured for me…they're mine, you see. Untainted. Untouched by shadow, by madness. Pure and clean as fresh water in the mountains. These moments…they're mine, and mine alone for now…and I did not wish anyone else, save someone I trusted with my very soul, to see them. Do you think that foolish?"
Thor thought of what the Chitauri had done to his brother, warping and twisting his memories until Loki didn’t know who he could trust, who he could believe in, who loved him and who didn't…save Thea. He thought of the raw desperation and fear he'd sometimes glimpsed in Loki's eyes, but hadn't recognized or understood where it came from. He knew now. His brother had feared losing himself to the Chitauri darkness, and his memories were the threads that bound him, the blood and bone of who he was. Memory had helped to shape him into the man Thea loved so deeply. No wonder he guarded these new moments, these new memories, so jealously.
"No," Thor said softly. "No, I do not think you foolish, Loki." He nodded to the butterfly. "That is…an impressive piece of work."
"You know her better than I. Do you think…do you think she will like it?" The man who asked this didn't seem like the Loki that Thor had known for so many centuries. This man seemed uncertain, and tired, and nearly broken. If his daughter didn't like the toy, it would no doubt devastate him. The littlest thing might destroy the once proud prince. He was still so fragile.
The crown prince nodded. "I think she will." An awkward silence fell. Thor wanted to speak, to break that silence as Mjölnir might shatter stone…but he was uncertain what he should say. At last, he said, "Do you want me to deliver those today?" He indicated the letters.
Loki nodded. "If you would. The butterfly, as well." He closed his eyes. Deep lines etched across his face as he whispered, "Swear to me again that this is real. Swear it on the Norns. Swear it on Mother's life, on Mjölnir, on the love you bear your own lady. Swear it to me, Thor."
"I swear that this is all real, Loki. Your wife and child still live. You will be with them as soon as the Bifröst is mended. This I swear, by the Norns themselves and the Tapestry of Fate, on our mother's life. Thus I swear by my hammer as well as my love for Jane. What other token can I bring you, my brother, to erase your doubts?"
Green eyes stared at nothing as Loki drew a slow breath and let it ease out again. He glanced at the four pages of Thea's first letter. Swallowed. Closed his eyes once more. Voice a mere thread of sound, he replied, "Tell Thea when you see her…tell her that I am thinking of two things. Two poems she loved. 'To Amarantha,' and her own poem. She will know which one you mean, and she should give you something before you come back to Asgard."
"Will that prove to you that is all real?"
Loki sighed and glanced first at the shimmering stuffed butterfly toy on the bed, then to the window. Birdsong trilled cheerfully through the open window. A soft, late-spring wind tugged playfully at the emerald velvet curtains. Loki bit his lip—not hard, but the flesh was so ravaged, a few drops of blood welled up all the same.
"What will become of me, Thor, if I believe…and then this all melts away? All illusion and vain fantasy, melting through my fingers like the substance of broken dreams…The shards of those dreams are enough to carve out my very heart." Loki looked back at him at last and added, "I do not know if I can believe, Thor. Not until she is here. Not until I can hold her to me, feel her arms around my neck. Until I can breathe in her scent and hear her whisper to me that she is truly with me at last. But it will help, I think. Perhaps." Dropping his gaze back to the book and the papers in his lap, he said, "It matters not in the long run, I suppose. The Bifröst will be mended soon enough."
Thor's brows rose. "How soon, exactly?" How much progress could his brother have possibly made in the few hours he'd had after finishing Thea's letters?
"Four days," Loki said. Thor's jaw went slack and he stared at his brother. "If the king does not insist on questioning my every calculation and actually puts intelligent sorceresses to work on carrying out the designated repairs. Perhaps I can speak to Mother about it. Odin will need a team of seiðr adepts for each spectrum matrix. The hardest will be the first matrix…the weaving requires someone adept with fire seiðr." With another brief glance at Thor, he added, "I suggest Angbodr and Amora. Give that suggestion to the king without attaching my name to it. If he asks, remind him that both of them are two of the strongest fire adepts in Asgard."
He hesitated. "You are certain you can work with them?"
"I will not be working with them," Loki replied. "I will give my calculations to Mother. She can give them to the king. Odin can do as he likes with them."
That was the second time his brother had called Frigga "Mother," but he had yet to call Odin "Father." Thor frowned. Keeping his voice nonchalant, he asked something he'd wondered about for some time. "Loki…you once said Thea was disgusted by our father—"
"Your father," Loki said softly. "He does not claim me as his son."
Thor shook his head. "That is not true. Our father loves you. The Chitauri have twisted your perceptions, Brother. Remember? They have—"
"Been unable to play with my memories of the past nineteen months to that point," Loki replied coldly, without looking up from whatever he was writing. "You came to me often. Tyr, Víðarr, even the twins came to me at least once or twice. In my bitterness, in my grief, I could not bear to have them near. I wanted so much to tell them…" He trailed off. The silence was broken only by the scritch of the pen and the crackle of the flames on the bedroom hearth.
"To tell them what?"
The tip of Loki's quill pen flicked against his lips, pinched nearly white. He gazed sightlessly at the page for a few moments before finally speaking. "I wanted to tell them about Thea. About Sophie. About the days and weeks and months of fear and blood and pain. But I knew they would not believe."
Gently, Thor said, "Mother would have."
"Have we not broken her heart enough?" Loki asked with a bitter twist of his mouth. "The bold, brave sons of Queen Frigga, the wisest and most beautiful woman in Asgard…no. No, I would not have inflicted that pain on her. I would not have hurt her with my confessions. But Odin." Loki's voice had softened and gentled as he spoke of the queen. Now a savage fury smoldered beneath the words, a coldness like the arctic winds of Jötunheim. "Odin never came. He refused to see me after my trial. Refused to look at me with any warmth, any love at all. The only times he came to me were because of you. Because you wanted him there. No matter how much he claimed to love me in the past, those words were merely that—words."
"Did Thea believe that?" Thor asked, wondering if he dared too much by asking. "You said once that she despised our father. That he disgusted her. Was that true?" The question had niggled at the back of his mind, but there had never been a good time to ask until now. When Loki had made that claim, even back then, Thor had sensed something like deceit in his brother…but not quite. More like Loki was only telling half the truth.
Loki let out a pent-up breath. "No," he said at last. "She didn't. But she had…has a generous heart. She forgives often and easily, and is always willing to give someone the benefit of the doubt."
Thinking of her hostility toward Nicholas Fury, Thor snorted. "Not always."
One black brow winged upward. "Well…she can be quite the mother lioness with those she loves. But no, she did not believe Odin cared nothing for me…"
.
The hollow bonk-bonk of the basketball thudding against the gray cement of the basketball court was oddly reassuring to Loki as Thea let the ball hit pavement, bounce up to smack her palm, and then slam back to the court again. Since that moment when they had kissed for the first time only a week ago in the illusionary ballroom, it seemed he found comfort in nearly every routine thing she did.
Perhaps because his silent confession of love had changed nothing between them. She still adored him completely. He still worshipped her. The new intimacy that existed between them, so beautiful, so strong when such things were normally so fragile, hadn’t damaged what they'd already had as they had both feared it might.
Loki lay, eyes closed, stretched out at the far end of the court—which Thea had made as soft as spring grass for him—soaking up the warmth of the sun. From the other end of the basketball court there came the hollow metallic thunk of the ball hitting the backboard before swooshing into the net and thudding back to the ground. Then there was silence for a time, punctuated only by the twitter of birds and the rustle of the wind in the grass. He didn't open his eyes when he heard Thea's footsteps on the cement coming toward him at a rapid pace. He waited until she bounded up to him and dropped down to the ground at his side.
"Hey," she said. When he opened his eyes, she was smiling, but there was sorrow in it. He wondered if she knew how often he caught a glimpse of the sorrow and fear underneath her happiness. It wasn't false, that happiness. Being with him brought her real joy…but that didn't erase the fear. They were still prisoners.
"Hello," Loki murmured. His lips curved into a smile when her fingertips touched the arch of his cheekbone, tracing to the shallow dip beneath the rise of bone, then to the corner of his mouth and over his lips. "Resorting to manhandling me during my repose, now, are we?"
She giggled. "You know you like it. I'm the greatest G-rated man-handler you are ever going to meet. Go ahead and feel all kinds of lucky. You won the manhandling lottery. Do a fist-pump; I promise not to judge. We love goddesses are above such petty prejudices." Loki merely chuckled and she grinned. "I'm glad you're smiling. That's why I came over. And to bother you." She pushed on his shoulder. "Bother."
"The horror," Loki muttered, unable to suppress his smile. "The agony. I do not believe I can bear another moment of this torture."
Thea pushed on his shoulder again. "Bother," she said, laughing.
"Oh," Loki said dryly. "Please. Mercy. It hurts." Laughing still, she collapsed onto his stomach, settling herself perpendicular to his body so she could use his belly as a pillow. Loki raised an eyebrow. "Comfortable?"
"Mmm," she replied. But then he sensed a shifting in her mood, a sudden seriousness chasing away the moment of amusement. Softly, she said, "Why don't you talk about your dad?" He stiffened. Tried to force himself to relax. Thea continued, "You've told me all about your mom, your brothers. Your friends. Your witchy ex-girlfriends," she added with what might have been a snarl under the words. "But never about your dad."
"I do not have a father," Loki said flatly.
Thea snorted, somehow keeping the sound from coming across as derisive. If anything, she sounded exasperated. "Everyone has a dad, Loki. You have two, just like me. Well, I have three, if you count the guy who spawned me like a salmon. But whatever. You've got two. One's a super douche who should go drown himself in a bucket of acid. The other is an idiot who needs parenting lessons…but you never talk about either of them."
He shrugged as best he could while lying down. "There is little to speak of. Laufey's wife, Farbuti, carried and birthed me. Then the two of them, disappointed by my weak stature, left me to die in the Jötunn temple from the elements."
He felt her nod. "Yeah, I know. Then Odin found you and took you in."
The disguised Frost Giant made a sharp sound of negation. Thea didn’t seem to react to his suddenly foul temper, his surge of irritation; in Asgard, if he'd made that noise during a conversation with a woman, she would have fluttered and dithered, trying to ease his upset, trying to avoid some sort of fallout. Thea simply let him be upset…which, in itself, helped soothe his temper. It proved that she didn't fear Loki the Frost Giant, Loki the monster, Loki the killer, Loki the destroyer of Jötunheim. His anger didn’t frighten her; he'd never had that from a woman before.
"He took me from Jötunheim so he could use me as a bargaining chip," Loki muttered, flexing his fingers. "To buy peace between Asgard and Jötunheim."
Thea said nothing for a moment. She simply reached around with her left hand and touched his jaw, dancing her fingertips over his skin. That soothed him, too. Loki had always detested being touched by strangers, but he'd found something comforting in physical contact with those he loved. His mother, for instance. Thor. And Thea.
At last Thea said, "He may have saved your life for an ulterior motive, but it's impossible to be around a person for that long without learning to care for them." Loki made a sound of derision—Odin didn't care about him! He'd proved that when he'd condemned Loki while the fostered prince hung practically by his fingertips from the haft of Gungnir. After everything he'd done to protect Asgard, wrong and dangerous and ruthless as it had been, his father had denied him yet again. But Thea added, "Look at you and me."
Loki frowned. "I fail to see the connection."
"Admit it. You would never have fallen for a freak like me, not in a million bazillion years, if not for the fact that we fell in love because we're trapped in our little conjoined hell-boxes. You wouldn’t have looked twice at me. And even when we became friends—and of course we became friends; I stuffed you full of pizza and pudding—did you ever see us falling like this?"
He shifted his right arm, bringing it from behind his head to atop his torso so he could thread his fingers through the warm silk of her hair. Would he have believed he'd lose his heart and soul to this woman? A Midgardian? A commoner? A so-called "freak?" No. Not then. But he had learned to love her, first as a friend—there had been no else, and he had needed someone desperately—and then as a woman, as his lady.
"Odin may have taken a bargaining chip from Jötunheim," she said softly. "But if you think about it, he lost that bargaining chip when he lost his heart to a sweet, innocent baby rescued from the ice."
There was something thick and salty lodged in his throat; it made it difficult to breathe, to swallow. He shifted, and Thea immediately sat up, knowing he needed some distance between them. Loki surged to his feet and staggered several paces away, shaking a little.
Lost his heart. Lost his heart? Odin? To the wretch he'd brought back from the northern wastes? To the foundling who could never belong? The one who was always second-best, always chosen last, always ignored, always unwanted? Yes, Tyr had been the heir, and then Thor after him, but…but he'd always tried so hard to be what Odin wanted and it had never been even close to enough.
"Parents always want their children to be the best," Thea added, coming close to him. She didn’t touch him. That was the thing about her—she would have long ago driven Loki completely mad if not for the fact that she always gave him what he needed. Perhaps her empathic abilities guided her. Whatever it was, she never offered silliness when he needed her consideration, never smothered him when he needed distance. "And they always worry when their children don't fit in."
Loki scoffed. "And how would you know that, Althea? You have no children secreted away back on Midgard, I trust?"
Her laugh was soft and inviting, a gentle coaxing to let go of his foul mood. "Yeah, no. No babies for me just now. You know, being a virgin and all. But I know. Trust me. I'm a mutant, for crying out loud. And so are three of my siblings. My mom's biggest fear when we were kids was someone finding out while we were out somewhere and a mob killing us because we were different from everyone else. So trust me, I know."
"You think that is why Odin always compared me to Thor, to Tyr? Even to Víðarr? Because he feared for me because I was a different?" Loki shook his head. "I was a prince. My so-called father was a king. What had I to fear?"
Thea came close enough to slide her arms around him. She laid her cheek against the spot between his shoulder blades. He felt her, warm and pliant, at his back. "What did you have to fear?" She echoed. "Every sucky thing that happened in your life. People being cruel to you, to your face and behind your back, because you were different. Which was what your dad tried to prevent by making you the same." She sighed. "Took my mom until Cleo was in elementary school—Cleo's the youngest—before she realized that it's easier to handle being different when you've got your family behind you. Looks like your dad hasn’t figured that out yet."
A rueful smile tugged at Loki's mouth. "That simple, is it?"
"Parenting is never simple. My mom always says anyone who tells you dealing with your kids is easy is just stringing you. It's all secrets and lies to sucker the rest of us into breeding."
The smile emerged in full force at her wary tone. "Indeed. So my brother says…or words to that effect. But tell me, since you seem fairly wise about such things. Why did my father not tell me I was a foundling?"
Thea sighed. "Because he's stupid."
Loki glanced over his shoulder at her. "That's all you have to say? No words of wisdom?"
"Actually, if you figure this one out, you've pretty much got the universe figured out, too. He loves you. Love makes people stupid. It also makes the world go round." Thea frowned. "Which pretty much means that stupid makes the world go round. That is a scary thought. But yeah, I think that's pretty insightful. Goddess of beauty and wisdom over here. Where's my tiara? But in seriousness, Loki…do you know why my mom made sure I knew I was adopted from the time she got hold of me and my brother?"
He shook his head.
"Because she was adopted, but no one told her for a long time. Somehow a kid found out about it at her school and told her some horrible things about how being adopted meant your real parents threw you away. She never wanted me or the rest of my siblings to go through anything like that.
"But you know what? We did anyway. Obnoxious kids said the same thing to Austin and Theo and me about our birth parents. In mine and Theo's case, it was true. Our mom left us on the steps of a cathedral in the middle of winter. We could've died.
"Odin probably didn't want you going through the same thing. You know how kids can be if they feel like it. Your mom even said it—they never wanted you to feel different."
"I am different!" Loki snapped, turning to glare at her. "I have always been different! And I have always been shunned for that difference! The Asgardians always considered me a…a freak! Unnatural! It didn't help, my parents' lies! It helped nothing!"
Thea shook her head. "No. It didn't. Because parents love us, and it makes them stupid sometimes. They think they're doing what's best, but they're really not. Can you blame them for trying?" When he said nothing, she sighed.
"I had a friend once. A girl at school. Allison. She didn’t board at the school, she lived at home nearby. One time we were all talking about running away, whether we'd really do it or not. A lot of the kids at school had bad home situations—or would, if their parents ever found out they were mutants. And Allison dumped out the bag she always carried, which had a lot of stuff in it. Another kid asked if she always carried that much stuff in her bag, and she said she did. We talked about that. But remember, I'm an empath. I knew there was more going on. So I asked her why. And she just looked at me for a moment, then grabbed all of her stuff, got up, and walked away."
Loki frowned. "I…do not understand."
She nodded. "I know. Wait a sec. So I followed her. And I realized when I caught up to her that the reason she carried all that stuff was because either she really wanted to run away, or she wanted people to think she really wanted to. And I asked her what it was like at her house, and she started to cry. I asked her if her parents hurt her, if that was the problem, or were doing things to her. Things we needed to tell our teachers about. But she shook her head and said, 'Worse.' When I asked her what it was, she said, 'They ignore me.' Which sounds kind of stupid, but I could feel what she was feeling. I knew it wasn't stupid, and it wasn't unimportant. It was major big, the kind of thing she was talking about. She meant they literally didn't care. If she'd been hit by a bus or robbed a bank or decided to tap-dance naked covered in chocolate sauce at the local Baptist church, they wouldn’t have given a flying rat's buttered carcass.
"My mom has never ignored me. She's never hurt me. She's never done anything bad to me, or my brothers or sisters. When the Super Douche hurt Austin, she got us out of there after letting us kick his butt a little bit. She's my mom. And she loves me. And I think, if I wasn't a mutant, the Super Douche would love me now just as much as he loved me when I was little. But honestly, I would rather my parents hurt me a little by accident trying to show they love me than for them to ignore my existence, like I don't matter to them at all.
"I matter to my mom. You matter to your dad. Parents just do really dumb stuff sometimes. Make mistakes. So do we. I mean, look at us. I love you more than a chocaholic squirrel loves an almond Hershey bar. I'd do anything for you." Loki's eyes widened and his heart knifed sideways in his chest, but Thea didn't let him interrupt. She continued, "And considering the situation in which we find ourselves—prisoners in the dank creepy dungeon of the alien-spawn of the mutant-demon cockroaches with poky sticks of shocky torment—that's pretty stupid of me. Logically, I should be looking out for just myself. You shouldn't even be bothering with a whacko like me.
"And yes, I'm a whacko. I had the opportunity to be Miss Universe because I was such a stellar babe and decided not to because I had to wear this ugly bathing suit and get my picture taken. Pretty crazy, right? I could've been a beauty queen. Boys would have drooled over me while ogling me on the television. I could've ripped their metaphorical hearts out with just my gaze. Think of the power at my fingertips.
"And yet, despite logic trying to worm its way into our brains, here we are. In love. Madly. Stupidly. Dangerously. Like I said—people do dumb stuff when they love someone. Even parents. Even kings. Even your dad."
Loki just stared at her for a minute, lost for words. Thea rocked back on her heels, sliding her hands into the back-pockets of her jeans, and waited for him to figure out what he wanted to say. Eventually he managed to murmur, "Am I to take it, then, that you think me stupid for caring for you?"
She stared back at him for several long moments of silence, then laughed. It almost sounded as if she were in pain. "Ohmigawsh, really? Are we changing the subject from your dad to you and our relationship now? Okay, fine. Do I think you're dumb? No. Oblivious? Well, to be honest…considering I was pouring out my heart to you last week and you didn't even realize it, yeah. Little oblivious. You don’t see how fantastically, splendiferously cool you are. I blame the Witches of the East, West, and…well, Amora's blond. We'll make her the Witch of the South. And what's her face. Sif. I blame the four of them. Death to the bimbos, blah-blah." Cuddling close to him, she slid her arms around his neck. "Here's the basic deal, Green Eyes. Either your dad loves you, in which case, yay! Or he doesn't. In which case, boo! Doom on him! But either way, you know what doesn't change?"
Looking into her eyes, silver and blue swirling together, a smile curving her lips, he asked softly, "What? Tell me." Though somehow he knew already. He knew what she would say, and it pushed back the anger and hurt still twisting and knotting inside him until it barely registered.
"No matter what anyone else thinks, I still think you're the greatest thing since the invention of butterscotch pudding. I'd eat your splendid and smexy self with a spoon, just like pudding…okay, that sounds just a little dirty. But, hey. I love you." She bounced up on tiptoe and pressed her mouth to his in a fleeting kiss that left his lips tingling pleasantly. "Forget everyone else. Who cares if you're a freak? You're a hot freak. Who cares if you're a Frost Giant? I dig guys with blue skin. Who cares if you're different? So am I. Really different." She shrugged. "So what? I love you."
Loki reached up to cup her face. Allowed his thumb to brush her cheek in a gentle sweep that sent her eyelashes fluttering. Thea drew a shallow breath. He lowered his forehead to hers. Rested it there, and just stood with her for a moment. Loki could feel how she melted into his arms when he touched her. Feel every beat of her heart, every shallow breath she took through slightly parted lips. Why did Thea trust him so much? No woman had ever trusted him with herself like this.
"That means more to me than you can ever know," Loki whispered just before his lips brushed against the soft silk of hers. Just the barest touch. A hint of taste. She tasted of chocolate and vanilla cream, with an undertaste of sugar and syrup. Cream puffs and that drink she liked so much…Pepsi. Thea offered him a soft sigh as his lips caressed hers again. Once. Twice. She pressed closer to him.
Thea accepted him. She cared for him. Loved him. It was so new, so strange, to think that someone he wanted, someone he loved like this, could want and love him in return…but she did. And that made her all the more precious.
Perhaps Thea was right. Perhaps love did make people stupid.
But Loki didn't care.
.
Thor strode down the palace corridor an hour later, Loki's words echoing in his skull long after he'd left his foster brother. Love makes people stupid. Yes, he thought. It probably did. But it was glorious, too. Both the crown prince and his foster brother knew that.
He'd already delivered Loki's instructions on the Bifröst to his mother and contacted Víðarr to arrange for travel back to Midgard. He carried Loki's two precious letters, as well as the butterfly. He would meet Víðarr at the edge of the Bifröst. Already Thor was thinking of what Sophie would do when she saw the toy her father had made for her. Would she like it? He thought she would, but…but what if she didn't? And how would Thea react to knowing that Loki predicted they would be reunited in a mere four days?
"Thor!" At the sound of his father calling his name, the prince turned. Odin emerged from the dining hall with something in his hand. He approached his son and held it out. It was a letter. Princess Althea had been written in Odin's strong hand. "I meant to give this to you at breakfast but—"
"Forgive me, Father. I breakfasted with Mother. I did not know you wished to speak to me." Thor took the letter, adding it to the two he already held. Noting his father's gaze on the prince's burden, he added, "Letters from Loki. One is for Thea, one for Sophie."
"And the butterfly?" Odin asked with an odd expression on his face.
"A gift from Loki for his daughter," Thor murmured. "Sophie is quite fond of butterflies."
Odin nodded, but he still seemed distracted, still bore that strange look. Frowning, the king said, "You were with Loki all through the night?" Baffled, Thor nodded. Odin pursed his lips. "Did he say anything to you about your mother or I?"
Thor hesitated. He didn't want to betray Loki's confidence or hurt his father, but…but Odin needed to know how his foster son felt about him. Yet if Thor's words encouraged his father to put even one foot wrong, it could cause irreparable damage to the already frayed bond between Odin and Loki. At last, Thor finally settled one, "He spoke of you both. I would wait until Thea comes to Asgard, Father, before you attempt to speak to Loki."
After a moment, Odin nodded. "Your mother says that Loki predicts the Bifröst could be repaired in a matter of days, if his calculations are correct."
He nodded. "I intend to tell Thea the same. I think it will help her. She is…grieved by Loki's absence. This news should lift her spirits."
"You're fond of her."
Thor frowned. "She is my sister. And she loves my brother."
Odin nodded thoughtfully, single blue eye distant. "I wonder if she doubts me as Loki does," the king murmured almost absently. "I hope that if it is so, I can change her opinion. She is the mother of my grandchild, after all. As for Loki…I wonder if it is even possible to change his mind about such things anymore." Then he seemed to shake himself out of his reverie. Smiling at Thor, he clapped his son on the shoulder. "Go, then, my son. Give your sister this glad news."
With a somewhat worried smile for his father, Thor headed for the Bifröst. But he had to wonder what his father was thinking. Would he try to sway his foster son's opinion about him? Try to heal the breach between them? Or would he step back, trying only to forge a bond with Sophie and Thea, unwilling to try for Loki again? That wouldn’t work; Thor knew that. The love between Loki and Thea would get in Odin's way. The All-Father had to know that he had to keep trying with the pseudo-Æsir if he was ever to have any sort of relationship with his granddaughter.
"I can tell from your face that you are thinking too much," Víðarr said as Thor approached. The prince dragged himself from his thoughts and focused on his brother. Today, not only was Víðarr waiting at the edge of the broken Rainbow Bridge, but so was Bellalyse.
Bellalyse, daughter of Ynġvï of the Vanir, was probably one of the most beautiful women Thor had ever seen in the whole of his eleven-odd centuries. Perhaps not quite as lovely as Freya, whom mortals had once worshipped as a goddess of love and beauty, but still beautiful. Her hair—which many of the women of court claimed was unfairly enchanted—hung nearly to her knees in a waterfall of burnished copper, with hints of auburn and antique gold. Though she wore it unbound, it never seemed to tangle. She had the pink-cheeked paleness of a mortal milkmaid, and hands that had seen their fair share of work, but Víðarr claimed her past as the daughter of a shepherd and farmer made it easier for him to teach her the basics of sword-work, since she already had more calluses and muscle than the daintier court beauties. She was a somewhat shy creature, but once she'd grown used to Thor and Víðarr's other brothers, she'd laughed and joked with them as if she'd known them all her life.
Thor knew she could do typical women's work—sewing, cooking, weaving, and the like—but that her passion was working with animals. And little wonder, for though Bellalyse had a great deal of innate seiðr, it came out in a rather unique way: she could understand the speech of beasts. At the moment, she was laughing cheerfully with a scarlet-breasted robin, which pecked industriously at the small bit of grain in her cupped hand. Víðarr went back to watching his young bride with a besotted expression on his face.
"And what says your robin today, my sister?" Thor asked Bellalyse as he drew near. The robin shot him a quick, nervous look with one bright, black eye before going back to the proffered grain, chirping occasionally.
Tossing back her hair, Bellalyse smiled at Thor. "He says it is easier to fly near the Bridge now. Something new has happened in the last hour; the air isn't so thick with frustration anymore. And he asks if I might bring him some barley tomorrow, because he's a little greedy-guts."
"But you will do it anyway, won't you, my älskling?" Víðarr asked, brushing his palm over the waterfall of her hair. She nodded.
"It's nesting season yet. The poor thing's been flown ragged by his lady-love, finding food for their babies; there's a cat nearby and she dares not leave the nest alone. I'm the only way he gets anything at all to eat." She cooed at the robin, who lifted his head and chirped back at her. Bellalyse made a little chirruping sound. The robin did a sort of hop-flutter and gobbled up the very last bit of grain. He cheeped at her, then flew away. She smiled. "He'll be back tomorrow." She focused her attention on the two men. Smoothing her hands over the skirt of her pale blue gown, she ventured, "Thor…are you going to see Loki's wife on Midgard?"
Thor couldn’t decide if he wanted to smile or curse. "Word travels quickly. I am."
Bellalyse laced her hands together. "When will you bring her to Asgard? You will bring her to Asgard, will you not?"
He nodded. "Of course. The moment the Bifröst is finished." He grinned at her. "You'll soon not be suffering for company aside from we few heathen men-folk, my dear sister. Does that please you?"
Her smile flashed, clear and bright as sunlight on water. "Yes. Not that I do not adore you scoundrels," she added, leaning against her husband and sliding both of her arms around one of his. "But it will be nice for the queen and me to have another girl in the family. Well, good luck to you both." She pressed a swift kiss to Víðarr's mouth and a ridiculous smile spread across the Asgardian prince's face. With another smile at Thor, Bellalyse added, "Take care, both of you."
"I will look after your husband, Sister," Thor said, clapping Víðarr on the shoulder. "You needn't fear for him. Come on, Brother. Stop staring after your pretty wife. She will be here when we get back. Come now, you need to concentrate, or we may end up arriving on Midgard with goat legs or webbed feet."
Víðarr shot him a quelling look. "I may not be a sorcerer, Thor, but I trust you have more faith in my seiðr skills than that."
.
This time, Víðarr brought them directly to the small copse of trees in Thea's neighborhood where the local children seemed to congregate. Careful to appear within the shadow of the oak and ash trees themselves instead of near the playground equipment, Thor had to take a moment to steady himself. Before his stomach could incite treason against him, Víðarr gave him another vial of mint tisane to swallow, which soothed his churning belly enough that he no longer feared being sick. Afterward, they made their way to Thea's house.
Unlike their previous visit, Coulson didn't answer the door. Instead, Thor found himself looking down at Cleo, Thea's youngest sister. She wore the blue denim trousers with straps that Thor vaguely recalled were known as overalls over a white shirt with quite a few multicolored handprints smeared across it. She tossed her wheat-blond hair over her shoulder and smiled.
"Hey, it's you guys. Is that hot captain with you? Oh. No, he's not. Oh, boo. Well, whatever, come on in." Opening the door wide to allow them entrance, she moved off down the hall, calling over her shoulder, "You guys here to talk to Thea?"
"Yes," Thor replied as he and Víðarr followed after the Midgardian maiden. "And to see Sophie, as well."
Cleo swiveled around, walking backward as she said, "Sophie's having her morning nap right now. You don't want her to miss that. She gets a little…yeah." Cleo grimaced. "You don't even wanna risk…yeah. No. Hang on. Thea! Hey, Thea! Theatre! Scientific theory! Theocracy!"
Thea poked her head around a corner, scowling, but her silvery blue eyes twinkled. "Hey, Cleopatra! It's pronounced 'thee-uh-tuh,' not 'thee-ate-err.'"
"I am not Cleopatra," Cleo replied with stiff dignity. She jerked a thumb over her shoulder at Thor and Víðarr. "Your in-laws are here."
Thea's eyes lit up. "Thor! Víðarr! You're back!" She came out of what Thor realized was the kitchen, holding a dishcloth in one hand and a small, translucent, yellow—was it a cup?—in the other. Without a moment's hesitation, she went to Thor and hugged him. "What are you two doing here?" Then the light in her eyes dimmed and her cheeks paled as she asked, "What is it? What's happened? Is it Loki? Is he all right?"
Thor opened his mouth, but before he could answer, Cleo half-growled, half-sighed. "Ugh, for crying out loud, relax! They're not the Mafia. They're not going to hurt him. Calm down before you wake up the midgets. Ashley's napping, too, you know. Look, Thebes—see? Thor's got stuff for you. Look."
Víðarr raised an eyebrow at the two sisters. "Thebes?" He echoed.
A small smile flitted across Thea's face. "If it's got a thuh-sound at the beginning with a long E after it, Cleo puts it on the nickname list. So Loki's all right?"
"Loki is fine," Thor reassured her. "Better than he has been in some time, in fact. My father let him out of prison. He spent last night in his own chambers writing you these." He held out the two letters.
Her mouth fell open. Her hands shook as she reached for them. The very tips of her fingers ever so lightly brushed the edge of the thick, many-paged missive Loki had written to her before her hands jerked back in an almost frightened spasm. Her mouth closed. She swallowed. Her lips parted again, as if she would speak, but then she just pressed her lips together and kept silent. After several heartbeats, she took the letters from him. Blue eyes slowly traced the name Thea written in Loki's strong handwriting upon the topmost of the letters. Her bottom lip trembled.
Thor cleared his throat. The sound made Thea jump. Her eyes darted from her name addressed on the letter to Thor's face. Thor murmured, "Loki is afraid to believe you're alive. He read your letters and watched several of the recordings, but he is still afraid. I asked him what would help erase his doubts, and he said to give you a message."
She nodded. "Okay. What message?"
"He said to tell you that he is thinking of two things." Thor frowned fiercely, trying to remember his foster brother's exact words. "Two poems you loved. 'To Amarantha,' and…he said the second one was…your own poem? He said you would know which one he meant, and that you would give me something before I returned to Asgard."
Thea frowned as confusion spread across her face. "Give you something? What…" Then her face cleared. Her eyes lit up and she smiled. "'To Amarantha.' Oh, duh. I feel dumb now." Thor's brows rose in silent question. "It's in the poem. 'To Amarantha' is a love poem Lovelace wrote to his sweetheart about how much he loved her hair. He wants a lock of my hair."
Cleo made a noise. "What? Why? Ew. That's kinda weird."
Her sister rolled her eyes at the maiden. "If you paid attention in history class, you would know that a lock of a girl's hair, tied with a ribbon, is considered a token of love in a lot of cultures—including among the Norse. And my poem…it's another Lovelace piece. Loki thought it fit our situation. 'To Althea from Prison.' Pretty fitting, huh? I used to read to him when…when the Chitauri had us. He told you that, didn't he?" She asked. Thor nodded. "I read him all my favorites, including that one." She nodded slowly, lips pursed in thought. "I know how to get rid of his doubts. Or most of them. I don't think anything will get rid of them all except seeing me." Her eyes flashed to Thor's face. "How long before I can see him? Do you know? Did you convince him to help with the Bifröst repairs?"
Thor nodded, smiling, because here at last was good news he could give her. "I convinced him. He has already started, and he says if all goes according to his calculations, the Rainbow Bridge will be repaired in four days."
Thea's eyes widened. "Four…four days? Four days?" She let out a cry of utter joy and threw her arms around Thor's neck. He returned the embrace as she cried, "Four days, just four days, I can see him in just four days!" She drew back, wiping at her eyes. "Four days?" He nodded again. She laughed. "Just four days. Oh, that's fantastic. I thought it would be weeks, months even. But four days…I'm so happy. Ohmigawsh…I'm gonna cry. I can't believe it!"
In truth, neither could Thor. Not really. It seemed too good to be true, that in a mere four days, the Bifröst would be repaired. And once Loki was reunited with his wife and child, the crown prince could return to Jane. He could bring her to Asgard. Introduce her to his parents, his brothers. To Thea and Bellalyse. And then…well, he would have to wait and see, but he planned to…at least, he hoped to…
"Oh, I'm so sorry," Thea said abruptly, jolting Thor from his thoughts. "I don't mean to be rude. Come have a seat. Um…Sophie and Ashley are going to wake up from their naps soon, and it's my turn to do the snacks since Joie and my mom are out running errands, so I have to stay in the kitchen. But you guys can sit down in the dining room if you want."
Cleo shot her hand up in the air. "Um, I got a question. What's with the stuffed animal?"
"What stuffed animal?" Thea asked, then noticed the butterfly Thor carried tucked under his arm. "Oh. I was so focused on the letters…and I haven’t had much sleep lately. Um…yeah, what's with the stuffed animal?"
The crown prince held it out to his sister-in-law. "It is a gift for Sophie. Loki made it last night."
"Oh, wow," Thea whispered, taking the toy. Her touch jostled the butterfly's wings, making the myriad of pastel colors shift and shimmer like light singing across abalone shell, only brighter. Thea stared at the wings. "He always makes the most wonderful things with his seiðr. This is wonderful. She'll love it. She loves butterflies and colorful things. She'll love this. Uh…come into the kitchen, have a seat. Are you guys hungry? Thirsty?"
Thor and Víðarr turned down the offer, taking seats at the wooden dining room table as Thea placed the letters and butterfly on the kitchen counter next to a stack of what looked like more letters from other people. Cleo left them, saying she had something called "homework" to do.
Thea moved to the tall, white ice-chest known as a "refrigerator." Opening it, she pulled out a small glass bottle full of brown liquid. When she unscrewed the cap, and a fruity scent filled the dining area, Thor realized it was apple juice. Thea carefully poured it into the yellow cup-looking object she'd been holding earlier, filling it two-thirds of the way. Next she added water, filling the cup the rest of the way, before screwing on the dove-gray lid. She then put the same mixture into a small green cup that didn’t seem to need a lid.
"What is that?" Víðarr asked, gesturing to the yellow cup.
"A sippy-cup," Thea replied as she went to a wooden box on the counter and withdrew a loaf of bread. "So Sophie doesn't spill when she's drinking. It's sort of the transition for little kids between a bottle and a regular cup. I cut her juice with some water so she's not sucking down so much sugar. She gets crazy if she has too much sugar."
"Loki was like that," Thor recalled suddenly. Noticing Thea's expression, he smiled and added, "Once when we were boys—barely knee-high to Father—we helped Tyr sneak one of Mother's special cakes out of the kitchen. We split it between the three of us, but even so…Loki could not sit still after that. Father didn’t know what to do with him. Or with me, for that matter." He laughed, remembering. "We ran through the halls like wild animals for awhile before Father made us each sit completely still in chairs facing each other. Then Loki started making faces at me."
Thea laughed as she took slices of bread and laid them on two plates—one green, one yellow—on the counter. Next she went into the fridge and pulled out two jars—one filled with what appeared to be apricot preserves, and one filled with brown…was that cake frosting? Thea asked, "Then what happened?"
"I made faces back," Thor replied. "And we kept making faces. It riled us both up so match we could not have held still if we'd tried. It was like having toads in our shirts. We have done that before," he added, seeing Thea's baffled expression. "I do not remember why we did that…but I remember we did, because a few of the toads somehow ended up in Mother's sewing room. Anyway, so we squirmed and laughed—quietly, so Father wouldn't notice, though of course he did. Finally he told us to go outside and run around the stables until our legs got tired because we were making him tired just watching us." Seeing Thea spreading what appeared to be chocolate frosting on a slice of bread, Thor asked, "What is that?"
"Nutella," Thea said. "Chocolate-hazelnut spread. It's made with Splenda, though, so it's low in sugar to prevent the kids from going nuts. Sophie's allowed to have it on Fridays if she behaves all week. Every day is a special sandwich day, according to Ashley, and Sophie agrees. Sunday is plum preserve day for some reason. Monday is tomato day, Tuesday is peanut butter and banana day, Wednesday is strawberry jam day, Thursday is peanut butter and honey day, today is Nutella and apricot jam day, and tomorrow is apple butter day.
"We let them get away with it since they don't throw tantrums or anything. We just started noticing a pattern when we would ask them what they wanted for snack, and finally my mom mentioned that they always asked for the same thing on the same day, so Ashley explained her 'schedule.' And Sophie just stood next to her going, 'Ya. Ya. Ya.' They were really polite and cute about it, so we just gave them their way. It was the weirdest thing, but it didn't hurt anyone, so why not?" Having finished the two sandwiches, she licked the dull knife clean of Nutella, then added the apricot jam to the sandwiches with a spoon. "I personally prefer apple butter. It's so good."
Thor watched his brother's wife quickly and efficiently cut each sandwich into four little squares, four to a plate, before adding two tiny bunches of green grapes and a half-dozen little carrots to the snacks as well. Lastly, she added half a stick of white cheese to each plate. Thor had let her do all of this on her own because he was fairly graceless in a kitchen and did not wish to get in her way. But he did carry the plates to the table for Thea while she carried the green cup and the sippy-cup.
"It's ten-thirty," she said, glancing at the clock. "I need to go wake the girls up…" Thea trailed off as a puzzled expression crossed her face. Her head jerked around and she focused on the staircase that led to the second floor. A wooden gate stretched across the bottom of the staircase. During their last visit, Thea had explained that the safety gates at the top and bottom of the stairs kept Sophie from climbing them and possibly getting hurt. Now Thea took a step toward the stairs. Her brows furrowed. She closed her eyes, touching one hand to her temple.
Her eyes snapped open.
"No—" She started to say, when from the second floor of the house came the sound of two little girls screaming. Without a word, Thea dashed around the kitchen counter, hopped over the safety gate, and raced up the stairs. Thor and Víðarr followed close behind.
Friday, October 4, 2013
Chapter Twenty-Five - The First Steps Toward Mutiny
Chapter Twenty-Five
The First Steps Toward Mutiny
.
Perhaps traveling by seiðr was having
less and less of an effect on him. Thor couldn’t be certain, but at least he
wasn't sick when they made it back to Asgard this time. His head swam, however,
and the Asgardian felt vaguely…almost seasick. The crystalline Bifröst—what was
left of it—seemed to rise and fall like ocean waves. Thor closed his eyes and
tried to calm his stomach before he disgraced himself. Somehow he managed to
keep a grip on the box he carried.
"Mother thought you might be sick
again," Víðarr said in a far-too-cheerful voice somewhere to his right.
"Here. This will help. Take a good whiff." His brother thrust
something beneath Thor's nose. The prince took a deep breath. Crisp mint stung
his nostrils. Immediately the nausea began to fade. Víðarr clucked his tongue.
"The mighty Thor. How easy it is to fell you."
"Shut up," Thor mumbled.
"At least I don't heave my guts up whenever I step onto a boat." He
opened his eyes to see his little brother scowling. Thor smiled and clapped
Víðarr on the shoulder. "Thank you for helping me in this, Brother. You
have proven invaluable."
Víðarr smirked. "Of course. Now
you, no doubt, have things to tell our mother and father, and I am missing my
beautiful Bellalyse."
Thor managed a chuckle as his stomach
calmed further. "Go to your wife, Brother. I shall speak to our
parents." He and his brother parted ways, and Thor turned to Heimdall, who
watched the crown prince with unfathomable eyes. Thor thought he ought to say
something to the Gatekeeper; Heimdall had grown increasingly frustrated with
his inability to penetrate the seiðr shields around the Midgardian base, the
school, and the house in Portland. But the Asgardian warrior had resigned
himself to Loki's guise being impenetrable. He could explain to Heimdall why
his extraordinary sight couldn't penetrate the shields.
"I see what you hold in your
hands, my prince," Heimdall said before Thor could speak. "I see the
tokens of love and memory within the box you carry. So it is true, then—Loki
has a wife and daughter. You bring him glad tidings."
Smiling to himself, Thor nodded. Of
course all the Gatekeeper needed was to look at Thor, at the prize he held, to
discern all that had happened on Midgard. "I have also found the source of
the strange seiðr shields. Loki's
daughter creates them."
Xavier had explained that Sophie had no
control of what power she possessed, but like all children, she picked up on
things from her mother. She knew Thea was afraid of something finding them. In Sophie's mind, the nebulous terms monsters and bad guys applied to practically anyone who didn't possess her
mother's stamp of approval, but Sophie also knew of the Chitauri. Thea's
control over her own gifts wasn’t as good when plagued by nightmares of her
imprisonment; Sophie had seen the Other in shared nightmares before, and knew
Thea feared the eldritch creature finding them.
Heimdall nodded. "That explains
much," he said softly. "You like this child and her mother. They are
no threat to Asgard."
Thor shook his head. "No threat at
all. If anything, they might be of great help. If Thea can be brought here, she
could help mend Loki's sanity. We will need him in the coming war. And perhaps
Thea can help in that conflict as well. Her gifts are reported to be
formidable."
The Gatekeeper raised an eyebrow.
"That may be…but I do not know if she will fight for us. I
sense…something. An uncertainty about the new princess and...and a shadow drawing near. You have sensed it as well. Perhaps it
is the svartálfar, but I do not
believe so. It comes at their head, but it is a foe known only to a few. We
shall have to see whether Princess Althea can be of help to us against it. In
the meantime, your parents were told of your arrival. They eagerly await your
news."
Nodding to the Gatekeeper, Thor strode
off toward the palace. It was late now; he and Víðarr had stayed for supper on
Midgard, and past, to bath-time for Sophie—he and the Avengers had discussed
the offer of amnesty and the inclusion of Loki in the Avengers Initiative with
Nick Fury and Coulson while Thea bathed her daughter upstairs—and then what
Thea called "jammie time." Sophie had insisted on giving each of the
Avengers and Víðarr a goodnight kiss on the cheek, and Thor had somehow been
dragged upstairs into the little girl's room with her mother for the reading of
a few bedtime stories.
The entire time, all the prince could
think about was that Loki was missing
this. It should have been his foster brother, not Thor, reading Sophie a
bizarre story of talking pigs that fought a ravenous wolf in hand-to-hand
combat. It should have been the green-eyed prince tucking his daughter into her
crib and making sure the nightlight was burning bright to hold back the
darkness. Loki should have been the one to kiss Sophie's forehead and bid her
to have sweet dreams before stepping out of the room and closing the door. And
it was only Loki who could have comforted Thea when she began to cry silently
in the hall, leaning heavily against the door, as Sophie's ensorcelled bear
began to sing in Loki's voice…but Thor had tried to ease his new sister's
sorrow.
He'd sworn it then, and he swore it to
himself again now—he would get his brother out of prison, make his father see
the truth. Convince Loki to help repair the shattered but mending Bifröst. And
then he would bring his brother's wife and child to Asgard and reunite them.
.
His parents were waiting in the queen's
sitting room when he arrived. Frigga rose and went to Thor, hope and eagerness
shining in her mead-dark eyes. When Thor grinned, she hugged him.
"It's true," Frigga said.
"Oh, Thor, you found them. Both of them. Loki's wife and daughter. He was telling the truth!"
His mother had asked, but Thor looked
to his father when he said, "Yes. I found them both alive and well."
He hefted the box. "Thea sent this back with me. They are letters and a
Midgardian device known as videos for Loki. But there is a letter and a video
for you as well, Father."
Odin had risen to his feet upon his son
and heir's arrival. Now the old king stared at the box, uncertainty in his
single blue eye. Thor studied his father. The king looked tired. Well, and why
not? After everything that had happened to and because of Loki, everyone was
worn down with fear and concern, hope and uncertainty. Thor came further into the
room and set the box down carefully on the table. Pulling a small knife from
the sheath in his boot, he sliced through the white strips—tape, Thea had said
it was called—to open the cardboard container.
Then he reached into the small pouch he
kept on his belt and withdrew a flat thing, perhaps four inches by four inches.
Odin and Frigga couldn't see what it was, because it was backed by white
matting, so Thor handed it to his mother. Thea's mother, Sophie Valerian, had
given it to Thor as he'd been leaving the house.
"Thea didn't think of this,"
she'd said. "She's so worried about Loki. You understand. But if our
positions were reversed, if I was your mother, I would want to have something
like this." And she had handed him a photograph of Thea and Sophie. In the
photo, Thea's eyes sparkled with happiness—though there was that ever-present
shadow in her gaze—and her face was pink with exertion and cold. Sophie, pale as ever, wearing a
thick coat and mittens and an adorable knit cap with a green poof-ball on the
top, was liberally dusted with snow. So was her mother. They'd just come in
from a snowball fight in the backyard.
Frigga made a small sound. One hand
rose to cover her mouth. She looked up at her husband. "Odin…look at
her." Odin drew close. His single eye widened as he studied the
photograph. One fingertip lightly brushed over Sophie's face. Frigga blinked
rapidly; her eyes gleamed. She whispered, "Loki's daughter. Our
granddaughter." She looked back at Thor. "And this is Thea?"
"Yes. I've spoken to her. She wants
to come to Asgard."
Odin frowned. "She has no innate
seiðr. It would not be wise or safe to—"
"She knows that. Víðarr and I
explained it to her. But she and I both discussed the fact that Loki seems to
be slipping further and further into madness. He needs her. I believe…I believe
I can convince him to help us repair the Bifröst. If he does, she could come to
Asgard in a matter of days, a fortnight at most. She could begin to help him.
Bring him back to us." Thor locked gazes with his father and added, "But
Loki would have to be released from prison."
The king stared at the photograph for a
long time, then looked at the box. "You said there was a letter for
me," he said. Thor nodded. Pulling back the flaps of cardboard, he
withdrew an envelope with Odin's name written on it in Thea's quick, casual
handwriting. She'd marked it with a blue thing called a "sticker," of
a winking smiley face in one corner. The king ripped the envelope open and
withdrew two folded pieces of paper. Unfolding them, he sat down and began to
read.
Frigga drew Thor to a sofa and settled
onto it, bringing him down with her. Letting her husband read, she leaned in.
"Tell me about my granddaughter, Thor. What is she like? Is she much like
Loki?"
"A great deal like him," Thor
replied with a fond smile. "She's clever. Professor Xavier—he is a friend
of Thea's, and a scholar—says her mind is many months beyond other children her
age. She can speak in almost full sentences and she understands things very
quickly. She is a bit bolder than Loki was as a child, but I think that is
because of her mother. Thea is quite vivacious. That is one thing that made
Loki love her. Sophie takes after Loki quite a bit, though. She loves books and
stories. Loves art. There are some pictures she drew here in the box if you
want to look at them."
Thor pulled out several drawings and a
few "finger-paintings" that Thea had packed. The finger-paintings
were mostly splashes of color smeared on white paper, but Frigga beamed as if
they were masterpieces. There were two paintings that made her pause, however.
Thor realized that one closely
resembled the drawing Thea had included in her letter to Loki earlier that day.
Sophie had smeared green paint in a vaguely circular motion off to the left,
blue paint in a squiggle on the right, and a series of smudged pink dots that
Thor realized had been made by tiny fingers in the middle. Darker green had
been wiped along the bottom of the paper, paler blue at the top, and a yellow
handprint in one corner. In Thea's careful handwriting near the top, it read My Family.
The second painting was carefully
done—all things considered. Two tiny green handprints near the middle of the
paper sat above a peach-colored smear. Another peachy mark, a smudged line near
the bottom, almost looked like a mouth. And dozens of layered black handprints
at the top made the painting look almost like a crude rendition of…
"It's Loki," Frigga
whispered. She caressed the paper with gentle fingertips. "It's Loki. She
painted Loki." Tawny eyes darted from the painting to Thor's face.
"Does she…does she remember him? Know him?"
He nodded. "Thea uses her gift
with memories and illusions to show Loki to Sophie, so that she'll know what he
looks like." Thor checked the back of the painting. Sure enough, Thea had
labeled it, My Daddy.
Suddenly Odin called,
"Guards!" Thor and Frigga both started in surprise and turned to him.
Odin said nothing until one of the guards entered the room and bowed to the
king. "Go to the dungeons. Escort Prince Loki to his chambers. Send a
chambermaid there ahead of him to draw him a bath, and have a page bring a meal
to his rooms. Three guards are to remain outside his bedroom door at all times,
but otherwise, leave him be."
"As my king commands."
Thor's eyes widened and he stared at
his father. "You will…release him?" He asked as the guard bowed again
and strode from the room.
Odin nodded. "It is requested by
my daughter, after all." He held up the letter. "She says there is
a…recording for me as well. Where is it?"
Finding the recording was easy—Thea had
labeled it plainly—and so was finding the self-charging DVD player she'd packed
in the box. What wasn't easy was making the thing play. Thea and Tony had both
explained how such devices worked, but that didn’t make it simple. First he had
to open it, carefully. Pulling up the topmost part of the silver box revealed
the black screen.
A small black circle marked Power needed to be pushed to turn it on.
Thor sought the black circle diligently and was at last rewarded. Pressing it
turned the screen from black to blue, with a white image in the center that
said Stark Industries. What came
next? Ah, yes. He had to press a smaller, blue circle marked Open/Close. He did so, and a black tray
slid out of the silver box. Thor carefully set the disc on the circular
depression in the tray and pushed the blue circle again. The tray slid back
into the DVD player.
There was a whirring sound, a click,
and then Thea's face appeared on the screen. Behind her stood several
bookshelves lines with tomes on Asgard. There was an entire section about Loki.
Another section about Thor. A myriad of books regarding Nordic customs. Where
gaps in the books resided, framed pictures sat. Thor saw there were a few
photos of Coulson, men who had to be Thea's brothers, but that most of the
framed images were drawings—including strangely warped versions of the few
drawings Loki had done that Thor had seen. It took the prince a moment to
realize the reason they looked so odd was because the perspective was shifted
to focus on Loki instead of Thea, the opposite of what the fostered prince had
done.
In the recording, Thea leaned back in
her chair. Thor realized she sat at a white desk. Lacing her fingers together,
the former mortal drew a deep breath, let it out, then seemed to look straight
at Thor, Odin, and Frigga.
"All-Father," Thea said
softly. "My name is Althea. Althea Odinson. I'm…I'm Loki's wife. I'm
making this recording because I intend to send a few things back with Prince
Thor and Prince Víðarr when they return to Asgard and I wanted to include a
short message for you. Thor explained to me that you're not sure if Loki is
telling the truth or not about me, about our daughter, and about why he invaded
Earth. Midgard. Well, I want you to know that he's telling the truth. The
Chitauri blackmailed him into doing what they wanted. If they hadn't threatened
me and Sophie, our daughter, he would have never…"
Lips trembling, she pressed her hands
to her face. Thor could see the strain on her face, in her eyes. Hear it in her
voice. Swallowing and clearing her throat, she continued, "He would've
never done those things if not for me. He was trying to protect me and our
daughter. Please believe me when I say he did everything he could to avoid
giving them what they wanted, and…and he just couldn't beat them. It's not his
fault.
"Thor says…Thor says he's in
prison. Please let him out. He doesn't deserve to be there. You don't know what
the Chitauri did to him. They…" She covered her mouth with a trembling
hand. Beside Thor, Frigga made a low sound of pain. Thor took his mother's
hand. Thea managed to continue speaking. "They were horrible to him. They
did things…he tried to hold out. He did. But when they started coming after
Sophie and me…he just couldn't take it anymore. Please, he's not the man you
think he is. He did what he had to in order to keep us safe. So please…please
let him out of prison. If you don't want him in Asgard, we'll take him here. He
can stay with me. I want him.
I…please just let him be with me."
A tear spilled down Thea's cheek. She
swiped at it, drew a shuddering breath. Then she closed her eyes, nodded, and
reached toward whatever was recording her message. There was a click, and then
the screen went dark. Thor looked to his mother. Tears wet Frigga's cheeks.
Thor squeezed her hand gently in his, and she offered a tremulous smile. Then
he looked to his father.
Odin's face held the same pain the
prince had seen when he'd reported that Loki had tried to take his own life.
The king rose to his feet and moved to a window overlooking the queen's private
courtyard. The light from the hearth brought out Odin's reflection against the
night-darkened glass.
"There is a letter for you, my
wife," Odin said after a long and heavy silence. "From Thea. She said
there is a rose on the envelope."
Surprised, Thor retrieved the letter
for his mother. Frigga opened the envelope very carefully, as if she were
afraid that by moving too quickly, she would startle the precious words inside
the envelope into taking flight. She pulled out the single, handwritten page
and unfolded it. The queen's eyes widened and she brought a hand to her mouth.
Thor moved a little closer. When his mother didn't object, he began reading
over her shoulder.
"My Lady Mother,
I hope you don’t think I'm presuming too much. Loki told me
once that if I
ever had to address you formally, I should address you that way. You may
have heard of me already, my lady, but in case you're not sure, allow me
to introduce myself.
ever had to address you formally, I should address you that way. You may
have heard of me already, my lady, but in case you're not sure, allow me
to introduce myself.
I'm Althea, Loki's wife. Please call me Thea.
I wanted to write to you, to tell you that Loki has always
spoken very
highly of you. I've wanted to meet you for a long time. Hopefully, if things
go right, I'll be able to meet you face to face soon. If everything works out,
there will be someone else for you to meet, too—my daughter, Sophie
Frigga Valerian-Odinson. Loki's daughter. Loki thinks Sophie and I are dead.
Hopefully, by the time he gets done reading my letters (I wrote him a ton)
and watching the videos I made for him, he'll know and believe we're both
alive.
highly of you. I've wanted to meet you for a long time. Hopefully, if things
go right, I'll be able to meet you face to face soon. If everything works out,
there will be someone else for you to meet, too—my daughter, Sophie
Frigga Valerian-Odinson. Loki's daughter. Loki thinks Sophie and I are dead.
Hopefully, by the time he gets done reading my letters (I wrote him a ton)
and watching the videos I made for him, he'll know and believe we're both
alive.
My lady, I don't want you to think I'm assuming we'll be welcome
in Asgard.
I don't know how the Asgardians feel about me being mortal once upon a
time, or about Sophie being half Frost Giant. I do know how they feel about
Loki, so I know better than to make any assumptions. But Loki used to talk
about how much he wanted you and Odin to meet me and our daughter if
it was ever possible, and if you want to meet us, I want to meet you. My
mom said that if it were her, she'd want to meet a grandchild, so…so that's
why I'm writing to you.
I don't know how the Asgardians feel about me being mortal once upon a
time, or about Sophie being half Frost Giant. I do know how they feel about
Loki, so I know better than to make any assumptions. But Loki used to talk
about how much he wanted you and Odin to meet me and our daughter if
it was ever possible, and if you want to meet us, I want to meet you. My
mom said that if it were her, she'd want to meet a grandchild, so…so that's
why I'm writing to you.
I love Loki very much. Thor says you know that Loki and I
spent a lot of
time in the Chitauri dungeons. He also says you're not sure what sort of
man Loki is now. Well, I want to tell you that when we were stuck in prison
together, he always took care of me. He would talk to me when I was scared
(which was a lot), help patch me up when I was hurt. He did so much for
me. That's one of the reasons I love him so much. Everything Loki did on
Midgard, he did to protect Asgard, or to protect Sophie and me. I just
wanted you to know that.
Sincerely,
time in the Chitauri dungeons. He also says you're not sure what sort of
man Loki is now. Well, I want to tell you that when we were stuck in prison
together, he always took care of me. He would talk to me when I was scared
(which was a lot), help patch me up when I was hurt. He did so much for
me. That's one of the reasons I love him so much. Everything Loki did on
Midgard, he did to protect Asgard, or to protect Sophie and me. I just
wanted you to know that.
Sincerely,
Althea Odinson."
Frigga and Odin exchanged glances once
the queen had finished reading her letter. Odin nodded. Frigga turned to Thor.
Laying a hand on his arm, she said, "Go to your brother, Thor. Make him
believe. Give him hope."
Thor leaned in and kissed his mother's
cheek. "Thank you, Mother. Father." Rising to his feet, he closed the
DVD player, grabbed it and the box, and went to speak to Loki.
.
He found his brother—as he'd
expected—in his bedchamber. Loki lay on the canopied bed, not even bothering to
close the green velvet drapes or get beneath the covers. He'd bathed; his hair
left spots of dampness on his pillow. He wore a clean black tunic and black
trousers. His hands were still raw-looking where he'd gnawed savagely on red-marred
knuckles and nails. When Thor entered the room, Loki only blinked.
"Loki," Thor said gently,
coming further into the room. He set the box on the small chest of drawers
beside Loki's bed and drew up a chair. "How are you, Brother?"
Voice empty of any emotion, Loki asked,
"What do you want, Thor?"
"I bring you good news, my
brother. Please…listen to me. Listen to what I have to say."
"Were you the one who convinced
Odin to let me off my leash?" Loki asked bitterly, seemingly ignoring Thor's
words. When the prince nodded, eyeing his foster brother warily, Loki closed
his eyes. "Why?"
"I brought you something,"
Thor murmured. "From Midgard."
Loki's fingers convulsed around the
edge of the pillow. "There is nothing I want that you can give me. Go
away."
Thor shook his head. "Loki…I found
them." His brother tensed, every muscle tightening until they threatened
to snap like an overwrought bowstring. Keeping his voice gentle but firm, he
added, "I found them, Brother. They're alive. Thea and Sophie are
alive."
Loki surged up from the bed in a
violent explosion of movement. Scrambling off the bed, he managed to put the
entirety of the room between himself and Thor before Thor could so much as
blink. Panting like a rabid wolf, eyes blazing with a mix of agonized jade and
sinister blue, Loki shook his head. "No," he snarled. When Thor rose
and took a step toward him, one pale hand shot up as if to ward him off.
"No! Stop lying to me. Stop it. I'm warning you, Thor…stop it."
"Brother, listen to me. I found
them—"
"Shut up! Stop it!" Loki
cringed back from him. The sight wrung Thor's heart. Even so much as a few
months ago, his brother had possessed enough fury and spirit to launch himself
at Thor, to try and force him to silence. Now Loki was so broken, he simply raged
the prince. "Shut up, shut up, shut up! Stop it! Leave me be! Damn you, Thor!"
Lips pursed in a grim line, Thor came
to a decision. Simply talking to his brother wouldn’t work. Loki was too
distraught, too afraid to believe. But perhaps…perhaps if he could show his brother…
Without another word to Loki, Thor
picked up the cardboard box and went looking for an appropriate disc. Which
should he start with? They were all labeled; were these the important moments
in Sophie's life thus far? Letting instinct and intuition guide him, he plucked
out a disc, read the label. This one would do. Opening the case, he removed the
silvery disc. Turning on the DVD player, he opened the disc-tray.
"What is that?" Loki
demanded. He'd yet to come closer to Thor. "What are you doing?"
"Proving it to you," Thor
said softly as he inserted the disc into the tray and hit the Open/Close button again. The DVD player
accepted the disc and began to make that same whirring sound again.
Loki shook his head. "Liar. I do
not know what proof you think you have, but I'll not allow you to fool me with
whatever paltry—"
"Come on, Sophie!" A gentle, encouraging voice issued from the
DVD player. Thea's voice. Thor watched as his brother flinched as if he'd been
struck. Loki took a step forward, hesitated. Anguish twisted his expression as
he slowly shook his head. Thin lips parted and Loki looked as if he might
protest, might try to deny what he heard, but Thea's voice cut him off again.
"You can do it! Mommy's brave girl.
Come on. Come on. Oh, she's standing up! Phil, are you getting this?"
Coulson's voice came next. "I'm getting it, Als. Come on, Sophie. You
can do it."
The green-eyed prince took another
hesitant step toward where the DVD player sat angled on the bed so that Thor
could see it, but Loki couldn't. Loki would have to come closer if he wanted to
catch a glimpse of the screen.
His brother took another step.
"Come on, baby. You can do it! You want Mommy to help
you a little bit? Okay, you can hold my hands this time. Good girl. I've got
you. Don't worry, Mommy's got you."
Another step. Another. The raw agony on
Loki's face was almost too painful to look at.
He took another step.
"That's right. You know how to do this. Come on…where ya going, Sophie?
Sophie, where you going? Huh? Oh, of course, Bear has to watch. She's just
like, 'Mommy, how did you not know this?
Hello.' You're so funny, Sophie-girl."
Loki was close enough now that Thor
could hear the way his breath hitched in his chest, the way he struggled so
hard to breathe evenly and failed. Loki's hands shook as he approached Thor and
the DVD player. The crown prince knew when his brother finally got a glimpse of
the screen because Loki made a choked sound and fell to his knees. Thor glanced
at him. Loki stared at the DVD player screen, all color drained from his face.
His eyes were vibrant emerald. Thor turned back to the DVD player.
On screen, Thea sat on the floor with
her legs splayed. She wore comfortable jeans and a sparkly green sweater that
matched the ring on her finger. The recording device was angled so the viewer
could see the scar on her cheek. On the floor crawling back toward her mother
was Sophie, a black teddy bear with green eyes clenched in one fist. She wore a
bright blue dress with ruffles. As the brothers watched, the little girl
stopped and set the bear on the floor off to one side. Patting the bear on the
head, Sophie looked back at Thea. Then, slowly and carefully, the baby got to
her feet.
"Come on, baby," Thea said breathlessly. "You can do it, honey. You can do it."
Sophie's arms windmilled around, and she stumbled a little. She caught herself
at the last minute on the edge of a couch cushion. Hushed excitement vibrated
in Thea's voice as she said, "Ohmigawsh,
Phil, look. Look, I think she's gonna do it. Ohmigawsh, where's Mom? Mom! You
gotta see this!" To Sophie, she added, "Come on, baby. Come on, Sophie. You can do it. Walk to Mommy. This is
so cool. You're so cool. Walk to Mommy, Sophie."
A strangled sound escaped Loki's throat
as his daughter carefully lifted her foot, then set it down on the floor. She
hadn't moved; it was almost as if she were testing the stability of the floor.
She did the same thing with her other foot. After a few more tests, she looked
at Thea and bounced up and down, laughing. Thea grinned.
"You're silly," Thea said. "Sophie's so silly. Aren't you? Aren't you silly?"
Sophie bounced some more, giggling,
then looked down at her feet. Her face screwed up in concentration, she lifted
her foot…and set it down in front of her. Thea's mouth popped open in a perfect
O. Leaning forward eagerly, she beckoned to her daughter.
"Walk to Mommy, Sophie. You can do it. You can do it, you're so smart,
you're so cool. Come on, baby girl. Walk to Mommy."
The baby took another step, arms
flapping and fluttering as she struggled to keep her balance. With wide green
eyes, Sophie took another unsteady step. And another. Thea's eyes were just as
wide as her daughter's as Sophie traversed the three feet between herself and
Thea, then collapsed against her mother. Bouncing and laughing, Sophie curled
her arms around Thea's neck.
"Ma! Oosh! Burba oosh ta! Ma!" Sophie babbled. Thea grinned and
nodded as if she understood what the child was trying to say.
"I know! You walked! Good job, baby! Oh, good job! My special girl, my
smart girl, you genius!" Thea cuddled her daughter and pressed a
flurry of kisses against Sophie's cheeks. Sophie squealed in delight. "You smart, smart girl. You're so smart.
You're so cool. Good job, honey! You walked! Phil, did you see her? She walked!
Ohmigawsh, Mom!" Thea looked past the recording device. "Did you see her? She walked to me! Good job,
baby! You so totally rock!" Setting Sophie a little bit away from her,
Thea added, "Walk to Grandma. Can
you walk to Grandma?" Sophie glanced where her mother pointed, then
shook her head. Thea blinked. "No?
You don't want to? What about Grandpa?"
Sophie shook her head again. Her mother
frowned, then a light kindled in her eyes. Looking over the baby's head, Thea
narrowed her eyes and twitched her nose like a rabbit. Between one blink and
the next, Loki appeared about five feet in front of Thea. The grief that
flashed across Thea's face made the real Loki draw in a hissing breath. Sophie
twisted around to see what her mother had done. When she caught sight of Loki's
image, she waved her arms and squealed in absolute delight.
"Da! Oosh gaja ba! Da!" Sophie pushed away from her mother and
took a shaky step toward the illusion. The mirage of Loki crouched down,
smiling. Sophie squealed happily. Another step, and another. "Da! Gaja oosh! Da!"
Several steps more and the child
reached the illusion. When Sophie tried to grip Illusion-Loki's hand, a woman's
hand caught the baby before she could fall over. Thor realized it was Thea's
mother. The mirage of his brother lifted its hand and smoothed it over Sophie's
hair before disappearing.
Sophie stared at the place where the
illusion had been, then looked at Thea. "Bageedee? Shooba? Da." The little girl toddled back to her
mother and sat on Thea's knee, obviously exhausted from the three trips across
the space. She patted her mother's shoulder. "Da?"
Thea touched her daughter's temple and
closed her eyes. Then she sighed. Opened her eyes. "It was a picture, baby. Remember? Remember Mommy's pictures?"
After a moment, Sophie nodded. Then she
uttered a stream of syllables that Thor couldn't comprehend, but Thea seemed to
understand. Perhaps because Thea took Sophie's memory of the basic meaning of
her daughter's words straight from the child's mind using her power.
"You did such a good job," Thea added, kissing her daughter and
hugging her. "Mommy's so proud of
you. Daddy would be so proud of you, too. Good job, baby."
Sophie dropped her head against her
mother's shoulder. "Ma!" Somehow she infused the single syllable with absolute love and adoration.
The recording froze, then faded to
darkness. A stream of letters appeared at the top of the screen in soft
viridian. They slowly began scrolling across the screen, down one side, across
the bottom, and then up the other side, before doing it all over again. It
said, Intermission—One Minute. Next up: Mommy and Sophie make a
snowman!
Loki cleared his throat. "Swear to
me," he rasped. Thor turned to him and wasn’t surprised to see his pale
cheeks wet with tears. "Swear to me this is real. Bor's ghost…it looks so
much like…like Thea. That's her voice. Her laugh. Her smile. And the child…her
eyes…is she…are they…they…" He turned abruptly to look Thor dead in the
eye. "Swear to me that this is real."
"I swear it, Brother. I swear it
by the Norns themselves and the Tapestry of Fate they weave. That is a truthful
recording, which Thea sent back with me for you. There are more in this box,
and letters as well. Pictures Sophie drew. I swear, Loki, that this recording
is real."
Loki swallowed audibly. "Then…then
they…they're alive?" Thor nodded. Loki covered his mouth with a shaking
hand and bowed his head. His other arm came up to press hard against his belly,
as if he were trying to hold himself together. He hunched his shoulders. A low
sound escaped him. Scrambling to his feet, Loki strode away from the crown
prince to lean hard against one wall. His legs shook. Buckled. He sank to the
floor.
Thor pressed the strange circle with
the double lines on it, which Tony had explained would pause the recording.
Then he got up and went to his brother. He put a hand on Loki's shoulder.
Knelt. Loki's entire body trembled. It took Thor a moment to realize that his
little brother was sobbing silently. Without stopping to think about it, Thor
slid an arm beneath his brother and hauled Loki against him. Put an arm around
his shoulders.
"They're alive, Brother,"
Thor said softly as his brother wept. "They're alive and they're safe.
Both of them. I met your daughter, Loki. I spent the afternoon with her. She is
everything you could have ever dreamed. She is fine, Brother. Safe and sound
with her mother. I swear to you."
After a few moments, Loki somehow
managed to get control of himself again. His voice was still thick with
suppressed emotion, but he scrubbed away the tears with the hem of one dark
sleeve, took a deep breath, and nodded. "They're alive." He
swallowed. Let out a shaky breath. "They're alive. Surtur's blade…oh,
Thea. My Althea. And Sophie…" Green eyes widened and fixed on Thor.
"Tell me about her. Tell me about my daughter."
So Thor told him all about reading the
"horsey book" to Sophie five times, of Sophie drawing with her
special markers by Thea's rocking chair. About playing "bayball;" how
Sophie had to take two naps a day, one in the morning and one in the afternoon,
and if she missed either she got cranky; that her eyes turned crimson like a
Frost Giant's when something upset her; how the little girl absolutely adored
the black teddy bear that Loki had made; the way she loved to imitate the
things she saw on television. Thor thought back briefly to watching Sophie and
Ashley play something Thea had called "Igor" in the living room…
.
Sophie put Bear on one of her flat, hardback picture books
which lay on the floor. Grabbing several brightly colored plastic springs that
Thea said were called "Slinkies," she draped them all over the black
teddy bear. She looked at her cousin Ashley, who wore one of her mother's white
button-down shirts—which
hung nearly to the floor and whose sleeves hung past the four-year-old's
fingers.
"Puh da sitch!" Sophie cried, waving her arms.
Ashley folded hers across her chest. Thor and the Avengers—watching from the
living room entryway—had to fight not
to laugh at the way the too-long sleeves flopped and danced. Ashley said
coldly, "Don't yell at me."
"I sawwy," Sophie said. "I's in da
momen."
Tony nudged Thea. "Does she even know what that
means?"
Laughing softly, Sophie's mother shook her head. "No.
She saw it in a movie. You know, the movie
Igor about the…um, about the Igor, who
wants to be a mad scientist. It's a kid's movie, it's silly. My brother showed
it to them and taught them this game. Anyway, she's just saying what the main
character said. She has no idea. She just knows it's funny. She does stuff like
this all the time."
Oblivious to the audience, Sophie added, "Puh da sitch peez."
"Okay, okay," Ashley mumbled, and flipped the
lights on and off. Sophie made a buzzing sound, swept the Slinkies off her
teddy bear, and gasped. Ashley cried, "Did it work?"
"Is alive!" Sophie cried. She lifted the bear over
her head. "Is alive!"
"Yay!"
.
Loki chuckled weakly as he leaned back
against the wall. Thor smiled. "She loves to play pretend. She
watches…movies, is that what they're called?" His brother nodded.
"She watches movies with Thea and pretends about the things she sees in
them. She loves to hear stories. She has a thousand books about all sorts of
things. She's brilliant and cheerful and sweet. She looks like you; you saw
that."
He nodded. Murmured, "She has
Thea's freckles." Loki's face went tight as he struggled to suppress
something. His body tensed. The green-eyed prince drew a deep breath.
"She's beautiful."
"Yes," Thor said softly.
"She asks about you." Seeing the stricken hope in his brother's eyes,
the prince nodded. "All the time. She asked me so many questions about
you. What you're like, what do you like to do. Even what you like to eat and
drink." Thor chuckled. He still remembered Sophie's bright, cheerful voice
asking incessant questions like, Daddy
like milk? Daddy like juice? Daddy play bayball? Daddy like Bear? Daddy draw
pitchers? Daddy make pitchers like
Mommy? Daddy do magic twicks? He smiled and nodded toward the box on the
bedside table. "Shall I leave you alone to read Thea's letters?"
To his surprise, Loki shook his head.
"Don't go," he whispered. "I…I want to read them. Want to
watch…but I…I need you here, Thor. In case this all…melts away again. I do not
know what is real and what is not, and I dread the moment when this dream
ends."
Thor reached out and gripped Loki's
hand. "This is no dream, Brother. It is real. Your wife and child still
live, and you will see them again."
Verdant eyes gleamed wetly as Loki met
Thor's eyes. "To see them again…to see Thea…and to see Sophie…" Loki
swallowed hard and bowed his head. Nodded to himself. Lifting his gaze to his
brother again, the disguised Frost Giant added, "Thea. How is she? Is
she…you said she was well? She is all right?" The crown prince hesitated.
Loki's thin, pale hand shot out and gripped his sleeve so tightly the hand
shook. "What is it?" He demanded. "What is wrong with her?"
"Nothing," Thor hastened to
assure him. "I promise you, Loki, nothing is wrong. She is fine…but she
misses you terribly."
A tremor shivered through Loki's
too-thin frame. His features twisted with something to sharp and raw to be
pain. "She…misses me? Then she has forgiven me?"
Thor frowned. "Forgiven you for
what, Brother?"
"For everything," he replied
simply.
Thor shook his head. "She spoke of
how she misses you, worries for you. There were no words about condemnation or
forgiveness. Only that she longs to be with you again." Thor patted his
brother's hand. "Whatever sins you may or may not have committed, I think
they are forgiven and forgotten in your lady's mind. Go; read her letters. You
will see."
After a long minute where hope and
uncertainty mingled in shadowed jade eyes, Loki nodded. Pushing to his feet, he
half-stumbled to where the DVD player rested near the edge of his bed. He
stared at it for a few moments in silence before turning to the box. Carefully
he pulled out each letter, checking whatever Thea had written there. Thor
glimpsed a series of numbers on each of the envelopes—most likely the dates
they were written. Each also bore Loki’s name. One of them said, Loki—Read
Me First.
Loki’s fingers trembled as he carefully
opened the letter and withdrew the 4 folded pages. He stared at them.
Swallowed. Light as a falling snowflake, he traced something on the topmost
fold. The tremors that shook his hands worsened as Loki slowly unfolded the
letter. His eyes scanned the topmost page, devouring the words…but then his
eyes widened. His lips parted in what might have been shock. He squeezed his
eyes shut. Set the letter aside. Bowing his head, he let out a shuddering
breath. Then he picked up the letter again. Set it down. Picked it up.
Grimaced.
“Loki?” Thor had gotten to his feet by
this time. His brother sighed. “What’s the matter?”
His foster brother held out the letter.
“I…read this.”
Thor stared at him. “You…you want me
to…are you certain?”
He nodded. “I cannot. Her words…” Loki
trailed off, staring at the pages in his hand. “Did you ever wonder how it is
possible to bear the weight of someone’s forgiveness when you know you are not
worthy? Did you ever wonder about the burden of being loved by someone
perfect?” Then he laughed softly, ruefully. “And if she heard me, she would
tell me that no one is perfect, and that I’m being foolish.”
Knowing Thea as he did at this point—and
knowing how much she adored Loki—Thor nodded. “No doubt.”
“But I need…I cannot do this on my
own,” Loki whispered. “Every time I think I shan’t disgrace myself, I find I am
too pathetic to continue without the shame of…I am not ärgr, Thor, but I…I love her. I have yearned for her for so long
and now to hold her words in my hands…please, Brother.”
Understanding that his brother’s
control remained tenuous at best, that the slightest thing might set him off,
Thor nodded and took the letter. “All right, Loki.” The Asgardian cleared his
throat. No doubt this would be…awkward…but it was what his brother needed. He studied the pages. Some of the ink had smeared after getting wet, but it was still legible. Had Thea cried while writing this letter?
"Loki,
I don't know what to say to you. I don't know what you
want to hear. What you need to hear. I just don't know.
I love you so much, Loki. I miss you so much. I think
about you every day. I've been waiting and waiting for
you for so long, and I'll be able to see you soon. That
makes me so happy. I'm so happy. I haven't given up
hope that I'll see you again. I'll never give up hope. I love
you so much. I love you.
want to hear. What you need to hear. I just don't know.
I love you so much, Loki. I miss you so much. I think
about you every day. I've been waiting and waiting for
you for so long, and I'll be able to see you soon. That
makes me so happy. I'm so happy. I haven't given up
hope that I'll see you again. I'll never give up hope. I love
you so much. I love you.
We escaped. Sophie and I, we escaped. I'm okay. She's
okay.
We're both fine. Thor found us today. He said you think we're
dead. All this time, you thought we were dead. I knew
something was wrong with you, I could feel it somehow, and
now I know why. But I'm okay. I promise, we're both fine.
Sophie is healthy and happy and just fine. She misses you, and
she wants to see you, but she's okay. I'm okay. We're fine,
Loki. I'm so sorry that you thought you'd failed us. You could
never fail us.
We're both fine. Thor found us today. He said you think we're
dead. All this time, you thought we were dead. I knew
something was wrong with you, I could feel it somehow, and
now I know why. But I'm okay. I promise, we're both fine.
Sophie is healthy and happy and just fine. She misses you, and
she wants to see you, but she's okay. I'm okay. We're fine,
Loki. I'm so sorry that you thought you'd failed us. You could
never fail us.
I never lost faith in you. I knew you'd find a way
to save Sophie
and me, and you did. You saved us. You sent Phil to get us when
you realized you might not make it back, and he rescued us. Just
in time, too. Sophie was born just after we got back to Earth. If
you hadn't sent Phil to get me, she probably would've died. I
might have, too. You saved us. Don't ever doubt that. You saved us.
and me, and you did. You saved us. You sent Phil to get us when
you realized you might not make it back, and he rescued us. Just
in time, too. Sophie was born just after we got back to Earth. If
you hadn't sent Phil to get me, she probably would've died. I
might have, too. You saved us. Don't ever doubt that. You saved us.
There's so much I want to tell you. I thought I'd be able
to explain
in person, but Víðarr said a former mortal can't travel using seiðr.
So I have to write this letter instead. What are you thinking while
you read it? I've got so many thoughts racing through my head, I
can't even sort them all out. I'm remembering snowball fights and
chocolate pudding on the beach and jumping off cliffs into the ocean
and watching the stars. I'm thinking about all the things I've wanted
to tell you all this time. I just can't pick one thing to focus on. My brain
is zipping around like a bat on crack or something. I don't have time
for a super-long letter because Sophie's waiting for me and I want Thor
to get this back to you ASAP. I want you to know - I need you to
know - that I'm okay, that we're both okay, and that we both love you.
in person, but Víðarr said a former mortal can't travel using seiðr.
So I have to write this letter instead. What are you thinking while
you read it? I've got so many thoughts racing through my head, I
can't even sort them all out. I'm remembering snowball fights and
chocolate pudding on the beach and jumping off cliffs into the ocean
and watching the stars. I'm thinking about all the things I've wanted
to tell you all this time. I just can't pick one thing to focus on. My brain
is zipping around like a bat on crack or something. I don't have time
for a super-long letter because Sophie's waiting for me and I want Thor
to get this back to you ASAP. I want you to know - I need you to
know - that I'm okay, that we're both okay, and that we both love you.
And I forgive you. I know you were worried about that. I
kept telling
you that I understood, that I knew you didn't have any choice, but you
were worried anyway. But it's okay. I forgive you, Loki. You were just
trying to protect our baby. Every day I'm grateful for her, and for you.
And I can't wait to see you again. I miss you so much. I know I keep
saying that, but it's true. I miss you. I can't wait to see you.
you that I understood, that I knew you didn't have any choice, but you
were worried anyway. But it's okay. I forgive you, Loki. You were just
trying to protect our baby. Every day I'm grateful for her, and for you.
And I can't wait to see you again. I miss you so much. I know I keep
saying that, but it's true. I miss you. I can't wait to see you.
I don't know if Thor will have told you by the time you
read this, but
the American government is granting you amnesty. You've got a clean
slate here. The German government is thinking about it. Phil's really
working with them to get that pushed through. Director Fury is even
considering offering a formal apology - not for arresting you, but for his
"unprofessional behavior" after you were captured the second time. He
told me about that after Víðarr came to see him. He didn’t tell me why
he was apologizing at the time, but now I know - when you screamed,
when you freaked out in the containment cell…this is so hard to write.
I'm trying really hard not to cry. But now I realize that you freaked out
because that super-douche, the Duke of Spook, came to you and told you
Sophie and I were dead. Oh, Loki…I'm so sorry. I can't imagine what that
did to you. But we're okay, babe. I promise.
the American government is granting you amnesty. You've got a clean
slate here. The German government is thinking about it. Phil's really
working with them to get that pushed through. Director Fury is even
considering offering a formal apology - not for arresting you, but for his
"unprofessional behavior" after you were captured the second time. He
told me about that after Víðarr came to see him. He didn’t tell me why
he was apologizing at the time, but now I know - when you screamed,
when you freaked out in the containment cell…this is so hard to write.
I'm trying really hard not to cry. But now I realize that you freaked out
because that super-douche, the Duke of Spook, came to you and told you
Sophie and I were dead. Oh, Loki…I'm so sorry. I can't imagine what that
did to you. But we're okay, babe. I promise.
Sophie's so excited to meet Thor (after she got over
being shy). She
knows he's your brother, I told her about him, and she knows she'll get
to meet you soon. She can't wait. She asks about you all the time. I've
shown you to her with my powers, and I've told her all about you. She has
a lot of picture books about you and about Norse myths and legends, too.
She's so smart, Loki. She's so clever. Just like you. She understands that
you want to be with us. She knows it's not your fault. She's just glad that
we'll be together soon.
knows he's your brother, I told her about him, and she knows she'll get
to meet you soon. She can't wait. She asks about you all the time. I've
shown you to her with my powers, and I've told her all about you. She has
a lot of picture books about you and about Norse myths and legends, too.
She's so smart, Loki. She's so clever. Just like you. She understands that
you want to be with us. She knows it's not your fault. She's just glad that
we'll be together soon.
There's a drawing in this letter. Sophie made it for you
when I told her I was
writing another letter. I was going to put it on the fridge, but she was
adamant - you had to have her picture. It takes some practice to figure out
what exactly she's trying to draw (our little Picasso, right?) so I figured I'd
explain it. I labeled it, too. It's a sunny day in our backyard. The pink thing is
Sophie (she loves pink), the blue thing is me, and the green thing is you. I
drew the faces.
writing another letter. I was going to put it on the fridge, but she was
adamant - you had to have her picture. It takes some practice to figure out
what exactly she's trying to draw (our little Picasso, right?) so I figured I'd
explain it. I labeled it, too. It's a sunny day in our backyard. The pink thing is
Sophie (she loves pink), the blue thing is me, and the green thing is you. I
drew the faces.
I put a lot of her drawings and finger-paintings in the
box Thor should have
given you. She loves to finger-paint. She's so serious about it, too. She'll open
one of her picture books and try to imitate whatever she's looking at. She used
to get frustrated until I told her that everyone has to practice to get good at
something. I told her about how you practiced seiðr for years and years, and
now you're the best. It perked her right up.
given you. She loves to finger-paint. She's so serious about it, too. She'll open
one of her picture books and try to imitate whatever she's looking at. She used
to get frustrated until I told her that everyone has to practice to get good at
something. I told her about how you practiced seiðr for years and years, and
now you're the best. It perked her right up.
I can't wait for you to see her. She's so excited to
finally meet you. She loves
you so much already. And the bear you made her - she carries it everywhere.
Thor said you thought she hadn’t had a chance to get it, but I took it and
Mini-Hobbes with me when Phil rescued us. I had to leave Hobbes because I
couldn’t bend over to pick him up and Phil said we didn’t have time to grab
him. Since I was in the middle of having a baby, I didn't argue.
you so much already. And the bear you made her - she carries it everywhere.
Thor said you thought she hadn’t had a chance to get it, but I took it and
Mini-Hobbes with me when Phil rescued us. I had to leave Hobbes because I
couldn’t bend over to pick him up and Phil said we didn’t have time to grab
him. Since I was in the middle of having a baby, I didn't argue.
But Sophie loves her bear, Loki. She takes it everywhere
with her. She
knows you made it for her and that makes it even more special to her. She
sleeps with Bear and with Mini-Hobbes, but Bear is her special friend. She talks
to him all the time about everything.
knows you made it for her and that makes it even more special to her. She
sleeps with Bear and with Mini-Hobbes, but Bear is her special friend. She talks
to him all the time about everything.
When you finally meet her, just to warn you, she's going
to talk your
ear off. Her talking skills are pretty advanced for her age - she can
make whole sentences and pronounce a lot of single-syllable words,
even several two-syllable ones - but if you can't understand everything
she says, don't worry about it. It took me a long time to figure her out,
and I had my powers to help. Just listen, and she'll be happy. She has so
much to tell you. She'll want to tell you all about her life - her toys, her
favorite books, what she likes to do, everything. I know you'll want to hear
it, too. I can't wait for you to meet her at last.
ear off. Her talking skills are pretty advanced for her age - she can
make whole sentences and pronounce a lot of single-syllable words,
even several two-syllable ones - but if you can't understand everything
she says, don't worry about it. It took me a long time to figure her out,
and I had my powers to help. Just listen, and she'll be happy. She has so
much to tell you. She'll want to tell you all about her life - her toys, her
favorite books, what she likes to do, everything. I know you'll want to hear
it, too. I can't wait for you to meet her at last.
She remembers you, you know. She has an eidetic memory,
like mine.
At least, we think she does. I'm pretty sure. She remembers a lot of stuff.
As she gets older, she'll be able to use it better. I couldn’t access
everything my brain stored until my powers started kicking in; it'll probably
be the same for her. But her memory is great, and she remembers your
voice. Even as a little baby, she remembered your voice. And I made sure
she knows what you look like and who you are.
At least, we think she does. I'm pretty sure. She remembers a lot of stuff.
As she gets older, she'll be able to use it better. I couldn’t access
everything my brain stored until my powers started kicking in; it'll probably
be the same for her. But her memory is great, and she remembers your
voice. Even as a little baby, she remembered your voice. And I made sure
she knows what you look like and who you are.
I've sort-of explained what happened in New York with the
Chitauri.
Obviously not all of the details, but she knows the Chitauri were holding
me prisoner when I was pregnant with her, and that you tried to trick the
Chitauri so we could escape, but that things didn't work out the way we
thought they would. That's exactly how I explained it to her. She understands.
As she gets older, I'll go into more detail, but I had to give her some kind
of explanation because of how some of the SHIELD agents treat her.
Obviously not all of the details, but she knows the Chitauri were holding
me prisoner when I was pregnant with her, and that you tried to trick the
Chitauri so we could escape, but that things didn't work out the way we
thought they would. That's exactly how I explained it to her. She understands.
As she gets older, I'll go into more detail, but I had to give her some kind
of explanation because of how some of the SHIELD agents treat her.
We have SHIELD protection here, and bodyguards, but
Sophie's perceptive.
She could tell a lot of the agents didn't like her, and she wanted to know
why. I had to tell her something, so I explained about the Chitauri and then
told her that some of the agents are confused about you. She understood
that, too. And I talked to Fury about the agents; he's tried to take care of it.
She could tell a lot of the agents didn't like her, and she wanted to know
why. I had to tell her something, so I explained about the Chitauri and then
told her that some of the agents are confused about you. She understood
that, too. And I talked to Fury about the agents; he's tried to take care of it.
Loki, I miss you. I wish you were here. I wish I could
cuddle you and
talk nonsense about chocolate otter-penguins. I wish we could throw
snowballs at each other and I could climb you like a monkey climbing a
tree and we could dance and just be crazy together. All the things we did
before the invasion. Isn't it weird that we did so much together when we
were stuck as prisoners, and now that we've escaped the Chitauri, we
haven't been able to do anything together?
talk nonsense about chocolate otter-penguins. I wish we could throw
snowballs at each other and I could climb you like a monkey climbing a
tree and we could dance and just be crazy together. All the things we did
before the invasion. Isn't it weird that we did so much together when we
were stuck as prisoners, and now that we've escaped the Chitauri, we
haven't been able to do anything together?
I'm sorry I'm so melancholy. I just miss you so much. I
love you. I love
you always, all the time, forever. And when I see you again, I'm going to
do a running jump and glomp you to death because I'll be so happy. Or I'll
cry my head off and hug and kiss you until you can't breathe (or until your
parents tell us to get a room). I don't know which. Something. Anything.
you always, all the time, forever. And when I see you again, I'm going to
do a running jump and glomp you to death because I'll be so happy. Or I'll
cry my head off and hug and kiss you until you can't breathe (or until your
parents tell us to get a room). I don't know which. Something. Anything.
Until I see you again, though, hold on. Hold on for me.
Thor said you tried
to kill yourself. Please, Loki, hold on for me. Live for me. I'm coming. I'll be
there soon, I promise. I promise you. I love you, Loki. Please hold on.
Wait for me.
to kill yourself. Please, Loki, hold on for me. Live for me. I'm coming. I'll be
there soon, I promise. I promise you. I love you, Loki. Please hold on.
Wait for me.
Love always, no matter what,
Thea
PS - 'I bring you with reverent hands
The books of my numberless dreams…
Man that passion has worn
As the tide wears the dove-gray sands,
And with heart more old than the horn
That is brimmed from the pale fire of time…
Man with numberless dreams
I bring you my passionate rhyme.'
The books of my numberless dreams…
Man that passion has worn
As the tide wears the dove-gray sands,
And with heart more old than the horn
That is brimmed from the pale fire of time…
Man with numberless dreams
I bring you my passionate rhyme.'
PPS - Booyacashah. The love goddess has returned. Feel
free to worship her
with your thoughts. She thanks you muchly. I love you."
with your thoughts. She thanks you muchly. I love you."
At the end of the letter, Loki
stared off into space for several long moments in silence, throat working
convulsively, eyes blank. His fingers tapped a spasmodic rhythm against his
knee. His face was pale. After a minute, he raked a hand through his hair. Drew
a breath that seemed to hurt. He nodded slowly.
“That was another poem she liked. She used to say it made her think of me. She is...she is different now,” Loki whispered
at last. A small smile tugged at the corner of his mouth. “But in many ways,
she is just the same.” He tilted his head back, tunneling his fingers through
his hair, and sighed. “She is alive. I never thought…never dared hope…and now I, too, am different. Can she love what I've become?" He looked to Thor. "I want to
see her. Now. Both of them. My seiðr is too weak to take me; where is Viðarr? I
must go to Midgard at once. Please, Thor, I must see Thea.”
“Loki, if you go now, you could be
taken prisoner by the Midgardians,” Thor said quickly. “Thea knows this. She
understands this. She wants you to repair the Bifrost. She does not want you to
risk yourself. Help us repair the Bifrost, Brother, and I will bring your wife
and child here to Asgard. I swear to you, they will be safe, and I will keep
them safe on Midgard until they can be brought here. Trust me, Brother. Trust
me. You cannot go to Midgard yet.” A spark of revelation when Loki just glared
at him prompted him to add, “It will upset Thea if you are captured or are
forced to fight the mortals.”
His brother hesitated. Eyeing Thor,
Loki said too softly, “I want to see her.”
A prickle of unease whispered down
the crown prince’s spine. Keeping his voice gentle but firm, he said, “Loki,
Thea has worked very hard to ensure that you can return to Midgard without
causing a war. She isn’t finished yet. Do you want to ruin all of her efforts?”
There was a heavy silence as Loki
just looked at him. Glacial emerald eyes fixed on Thor as the silence stretched
out between them. Finally, Loki nodded. Then he looked at the letters in a pile
on the bed. Then he glanced at the DVD player. The video was still frozen. He
looked back at Thor and the taut chill faded from his expression. Softly, he
murmured, “Did you see her? She was walking. My little Sophie…she was walking.
She took her first steps.”
Thor nodded. “Yes,” he said with a
small smile. “Yes, I saw her.”
“I never thought I would see it,”
Loki said. He looked again at the screen. Next
up: Mommy and Sophie make a snowman! blinked cheerfully at them. With a
soft smile edged with no little sorrow, the green-eyed prince whispered, “I
never thought I would see her take her first steps. My child…my little girl…”
Loki looked at Thor once more and sighed. “I want to see my daughter, Thor. I
want to see her. Hold her. I never…I wasn’t there when she was born,” he added.
“I should have been there when Sophie was born, but I wasn’t. I never got to
see her take her first breath. Never heard her first cry. I was never allowed
to hold her. My little girl…I want so much to see her, Brother.”
“And you will,” Thor assured him. “I promise you, Loki. You will see Thea
and Sophie again. Soon. Once the Bifrost is repaired, I will bring them to you.
I swear it.”
Loki nodded slowly. “Thank you,
Brother.” With another sigh, the fostered prince took the chair Thor had set
beside the bed. “Now…I want to watch my wife and daughter making this snowman.”
With trembling fingers, he pressed the button to unfreeze the video. After
perhaps twenty seconds of black screen and letters, a new recording began.
“Sophie, look at the snow! Look at the snow! Oh, it’s
cold, isn’t it? It’s so cold! Hang on, let me put on your mittens. No, don’t
run outside…and there she goes. Joie, catch her! She’s not wearing mittens!
Grab her!”
On the screen, Thea raced out as her
sister grabbed a toddling Sophie bundled up in a fluffy green coat. Tiny red
hands waved and Sophie squealed in delight. Thea made it outside, and the
recording device followed. Thea glanced toward the recorder.
“Phil, stop laughing. She’s a lightning bug. I’m old.”
“I’m older, Als, and I can keep up with her just fine. You're not even thirty.”
“Oh…go rub a monkey’s tummy. Sophie, come here! We’re
gonna make a snowman! You wanna make a snowman?” Thea asked, grinning. Sophie nodded and made a garbled
sound that made Thea laugh. ”Okay! Let’s
go—after
we put on mittens or your little hands will get all frosty.”
“She’s a Frost Giant,”
Coulson said. “She should be fine.”
“Don’t give her any ideas! There we go. Okay, mittens on.
Now let’s make a snowman. Or…hey, Sophie. I got an idea. Let’s throw snowballs
at Grandpa!”
“Hey, wait a minute, now—“
“Let’s get him!”
Delighted by this game, Sophie scooped
up a small handful of snow and flung it at Coulson. “Ya! Ya! Ya!”
“This is mutiny!”
Thea laughed. “Hear that, Sophie-girl? Let’s do some mutiny!”
“Ya!”
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